


A Will or Away

by Sinca



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/F, Femslash, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-05-09 01:46:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 27
Words: 23,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14706785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinca/pseuds/Sinca
Summary: Emily notices something is going on with JJ and struggles to support the blonde while battling with her own feelings for the woman. Warnings are written prior to each chapter. I've finished writing this story, simply need to post it so don't worry about me leaving it unfinished.





	1. Chapter 1

**Warning: Mentions of abduction and murder**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Criminal Minds. All aspects of this plot are of my own creation.**

* * *

"Ge' offa me, Sergio," Emily said, pushing a warm body off of her face and sitting up. 7:30 AM. That cat wakes her up like clockwork, just begging to be fed.

"Alright, alright. I'm getting up," she said as Sergio began his chorus of complaining mews. She threw the blankets to the side and slipped out of bed.

"It's freezing!" she complained aloud, "you make me get out of bed in this ungodly cold just because you're hungry. Well, I'm sorry if my health and well-being inconvenience his highness."

She was met with only a meow and Sergio's tail disappearing through the door. She groaned and followed suit.

Emily and her cat went downstairs into the kitchen. She fed the cat and poured herself a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal, starting her day the same way as always. Sergio jumped into her lap as she at and she scratched his ears, waiting for the coffee to take effect. Finally, she managed to get enough energy to return to her bedroom and get ready for the day. By 8, she was out the door, on her way to the BAU.

Soon, Emily was walking through those familiar glass doors and into the bullpen.

"Mornin', princess," Morgan called, flashing her his signature blinding smile.

"Hey, Morgan," Emily responded, placing her go bag beside her desk, "JJ in yet?"

"Not yet. She's cutting it awfully close."

"She's been showing up later and later these days," Emily commented.

"Maybe Will's been keeping her up if you know what I mean," Morgan said with a wink.

"Prior to dating Will, JJ came to work 99.8762% of the time, being at least 5 minutes early about 94% of those days. Ever since they started dating, JJ's attendance has dropped to 94.5984% and she refrains from being tardy only about 76% of the time." Reid chimed in, all numbers, as usual.

"Well there you go," Morgan said, "Will must be keeping her busy."

"If you're interested, Morgan, you're only on time 68% of the time, averaging about 0.34 minutes late," Reid told him.

"Close enough," Morgan dismissed, turning away from Reid, "hey! There's our blonde-haired beauty," he said, noticing the elevator doors slide open and a disgruntled-looking JJ emerging from them.

"Just in time, too, it seems," Reid pointed out, as Hotch beckoned the group into the briefing room and Emily jogged up to JJ.

"Hey, Jayje," Emily said, following the blonde agent to her office, where JJ put down the files she'd brought home the previous day. If Emily were honest with herself, she'd always had quite a crush on the younger woman. She'd practically thrown JJ toward Will to stop herself from asking JJ out herself. The strategy had prevented Emily from getting herself hurt in some ways, but she couldn't stop herself from trying to be as close to JJ as possible at all times.

"Hey," JJ replied.

"Hey," Emily repeated herself, melting at the flustered smile the blonde threw toward her. "I mean, why're you so late?"

"Oh I just slept through my alarm," JJ said with a small laugh, wincing as she finally put down the heavy boxes off files.

"Sorry, I should've offered to help you with those," Emily realized, attempting to force herself to focus on something other than the way JJ's pants hugged her in all the right places and how her hair looked perfect no matter what style she put it in and the way JJ could make any victim feel safe and comfortable in a matter of seconds and the way she smelled like flowers and sunshine –

"Aren't we supposed to be in the briefing room?" JJ asked, snapping Emily back into reality.

"Right. Sorry. I guess I'm a little out of it." Emily said, shaking her head in an attempt to clear it, "Let's go," she finished, walking quickly out of JJ's office.

"4 women have been abducted over the course of 2 weeks." Garcia said the moment JJ and Emily entered the room, "each of their bodies washed up along the Jersey boardwalk. Atlantic City PD has asked us to help since they are pretty much lost on what to do."

"Clearly, the killer is working quickly so we need to be quicker. Wheels up in 10." Hotch added, sending the team off to prepare for the trip.


	2. Chapter 2

**Warning: Mentions of violence**

**Note: Some chapters might be short (sorry, it's the best place to cut them off) but I'll probably be posting daily (unless I forget) so you won't have to wait too long.**

* * *

"I'm sorry but I – no, no that's not the reason. It's my job, I can't – " Hotch had sent Emily to light a fire under JJ and now Emily was perched outside the blonde's office, listening to a frustrated JJ try to explain something to the person on the other end of her phone call.

"Look, you knew this was – that's not what I said! No, I'm sorry…you're right, I'm sorry. I'll have someone send – okay, you're right…I will…you too…see you soon…bye." Emily jumped back a few steps and acted like she was just about to approach the office when JJ emerged.

"Hey, Hotch sent me to get you. They're all on the jet," Emily said with a smile, trying to mask the questions she had about the phone call she had just overheard.

"Oh, sorry! I just had to set a few things before I took off. I'm ready now, let's go." JJ said, flustered, before walking quickly toward the elevator.

"So this guy's either really brave or really stupid," Morgan said once they were all on the plane, "at the very least he wants these bodies to be found."

"How does he dispose of the bodies on the shore there, though?" Emily inquired, "the boardwalk is always covered with tourists."

"Atlantic City sees over 27 million visitors each year, most of them tourists," Reid pointed out.

"That sort of crowd wouldn't be the kind to turn in early," Rossi added, "so the boardwalk would probably be busy at all times of day and night. So how did he do it undetected?"

"Let's look at victimology," Emily suggested once it was clear no one had any ideas on disposal methods, "all of these women have dark hair, blue eyes, and small builds – the tallest is only 5'3" so he clearly has a type."

"They could be surrogates," Hotch mentioned, "maybe there's a woman in his life causing his anger."

"It's almost certainly a man," Morgan said, picking up on Hotch's use of pronouns, "most women wouldn't be able to carry those bodies and dispose of them as quickly as they would have needed to be."

"He's probably young, then," Rossi added, "I'd say late 20's, by the age of our victims. Plus, I don't know about you, Hotch, but my back would give out if I tried to lift a corpse these days."

"Hey, Garcia," Hotch said to the computer, skating past Rossi's implication that he was aging, "have you found any connections between the victims?"

"Nothing too obvious," Garcia told the webcam, tapping away at her keyboard, "but I did find out that each of them was abducted from their homes with no forced entry, so he's gotta know them somehow."

"So, this guy gets into and out of the victims' houses, takes the victims, kills them, and then dumps them next to a major tourist attraction all without being detected?" Morgan asked incredulously.

"We'll have to think about that when we get to the station. We're heading down." Hotch told the team.

"You've been awfully quiet," Emily said, sitting down next to JJ, "Everything alright?"

"Oh, yeah. Everything's fine," JJ muttered, distractedly.

"What's so interesting on your phone?" Emily prodded. JJ had been staring at the small screen the whole flight with a small pout on her face.

"Oh, it's nothing," JJ said, finally looking up. "Just trying to get a hold of Will. We had a fight earlier and I didn't want to leave on a case without smoothing it over."

"Got it," Emily said, nodding, "don't worry. I'm sure it'll blow over soon." She pointed out.

"Yeah, I guess so," JJ mumbled, "but I just want to be sure," she explained.

"Well, I'm sure he'll pick up eventually," Emily told JJ as the blonde put the phone to her ear once again. "Come on, you can try again in the car," she said as the plane touched down.

The pair stood up and gathered their stuff, looking to Hotch for instructions.

"Alright, Emily and Morgan, head to the disposal site to see what you can find. Rossi and JJ, head to the victim's houses to see what you can learn from the families. Reid and I will get set up at the station." Hotch instructed.

The unit chief was met with a chorus of "Yes, sir"s and each pair headed to their waiting police cars.

"Whatcha thinkin' about, princess?" Morgan asked Emily, glancing over to see the brunette staring out the passenger side window.

"Oh, no one," Emily muttered distractedly.

"No one? Who is it?" Morgan said, a smirk on his face.

"What? Oh! No! I meant nothing. I meant nothing!" Emily tried desperately to backtrack, her eyes wide.

"Nuh uh uh," Morgan chuckled, "cat's out of the bag now, princess. Who is it?"

"It's – it's no one," Emily said, looking back out the window.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with little blondie, would it?" Morgan asked, a playful smile on his face.

"What?" Emily shouted, her head whipping around to give him an incredulous look. "No! What? Who? No!"

"Don't even try to deny it," Morgan laughed, "Garcia and I have had our suspicions for a long time now."

"Garcia!" Emily shouted in understanding. "I knew I shouldn't've tried to keep something from her."

"No, you should not have. Now spill. What x rated thoughts have got you daydreaming in the middle of a case?" Morgan teased.

"Oh, shut up," Emily said, smiling a little and giving Morgan a light slap on the shoulder. "Nothing like that," she admitted finally. Morgan was like a brother to her. She knew she could tell him anything. "I just…I pushed her to Will to stop myself from doing something stupid but now…I don't know."

"Now you wish you'd just done the stupid thing?" Morgan suggested,

"Yeah," Emily sighed. "But now she's with Will, and they seem to be pretty serious. So there's nothing I can do anymore. Even if I had told her, there's no way she would feel the same. She'd probably think I was a freak."

"Nah. She dated a few girls in college," Morgan said offhandedly.

"She what?" Emily shouted, incredulous once more.

"Yeah! She told me one night at the bars. I was checking out this hot bartender and she told me brunette was a good choice because 'those girls are sweet on the couch but animals on the bed'," he explained with a wink, "she was right, too," he added with another smirk.

"Oh my god," Emily said, leaning her head back in shock. "JJ's bi? And she likes brunette's?"

"Yup. But don't let on I told you. I was sworn to secrecy," Morgan responded, guiltily.

"I won't say a word," Emily assured him. "God, JJ's bi," she repeated, shaking her head in astonishment. "Then I really blew my shot with her!" she realized, "I could've told her how I felt and she wouldn't've hated me! She may have even felt the same!" Emily berated herself, "Now she's with Will I've got no hope!"

"I wouldn't be so sure," Morgan hinted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Emily asked hopefully.

"She doesn't seem that into him." Morgan shrugged.

"What do you mean? Just this morning you were saying they must've…had…done the…I don't even wanna think about it," Emily grimaced.

"Yeah, but sex isn't the only thing necessary in a relationship, you know," he pointed out.

"I know that. I didn't think you would, though," Emily teased.

"Hey!" Morgan said, a petulant look crossing his face, "I know how to have a relationship. I just choose not to! Anyway, she seems bored with him. She doesn't like to talk about him. Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy. I just don't think they're totally compatible."

"I hope you're right," Emily said, as they pulled up to the boardwalk and stopped the car, "now back to work."


	3. Chapter 3

**Warning: Violence, Language**

* * *

By the end of the day, they had managed to get a few solid leads. Turns out each of the women had the same internet provider and Garcia was already cycling through their employees. Meanwhile, another victim, Marcia Phillips, had been taken and the BAU was desperate to save her in time.

"He usually kills them the morning after they're taken and dumps them that night," Morgan said.

"So, we've got about 10 hours before she's done for," Emily pointed out.

"We can do this," Rossi said, trying to inject some optimism.

"I've narrowed down his comfort zone to this 5-mile radius," Reid said helpfully.

"Once Garcia gets us a – " JJ began but was cut off by her phone vibrating. She rejected the call and continued, "gets us a suspect list we can see – " her phone buzzed again, and she silenced it, "we can see which of the employees live in that area."

"Ask and you shall receive, my dears," Garcia's voice said as her face appeared on the screen of the laptop in front of them. "I have a list of 32 employees that fit the profile. Give me more."

"Alright, well, we found out from the victim's families that all of them were in a serious relationship, so I think he was or is dating the subject of his anger. Look for men that have a girlfriend, fiancée, or wife that fits the victim description," JJ suggested.

"Okay. We're down to 14. More." Garcia responded.

"Did you narrow it down by our geographic profile?" Reid asked, pointing to the map he had been writing on.

"Done. 7. Give me more." Garcia said, her fingers tapping rapidly.

"Based on the dump site, maybe he owns a boat. That's the only way I can think of him getting the bodies there without being seen. Would you agree, Emily?" Morgan realized, checking with Emily to see if she agreed with his crime scene deductions.

"Hmm? Oh. Yeah, that makes sense. When we were there, there were hundreds of people passing by. He couldn't've dumped a body without being noticed," Emily said, trying to focus. She had been staring at JJ's phone which was still laying on the table and was lighting up every few seconds with a new notification. She had just managed to make out what the fine print said when Morgan asked her about the case.

"That did it. Only 2 names. Gary Langborne – oh, well he's got a broken leg right now, so not him. It must be…Jackson Mills. Work, home, and harbor addresses sent. Good luck, crimefighters!" Garcia said, signing off.

"Alright. Rossi and Emily, take the harbor. Search his boat thoroughly. Reid and Morgan, head to his home. JJ and I will take his work." Hotch commanded and the team split off.

Emily sat in the passenger seat, nerves on edge, as Rossi sped toward the docks. She really hoped Mills was at the harbor, so she could kick some criminal butt. Maybe then she could stop thinking so much about JJ. Will had called 6 times and left 32 messages. Why wasn't JJ answering? What on earth did Will need so badly? Emily shook her head to focus as the car screeched to a halt by the harbor.

The pair jumped out of the vehicle, guns drawn. The harbormaster ran up to them, having been forewarned of their arrival, and explained how to get to the unsub's boat. Rossi nodded and motioned to Emily to follow him.

"FBI! Open the door!" Rossi shouted into the hatch of the small yacht. They heard movement from within and a head popped out from the porthole on top of the cabin.

"Mills, stay where you are!" Emily commanded.

His head ducked back inside and a woman's replaced it. He was using Phillips as a shield.

"Marcia! We're with the FBI. We're here to help you," Emily called to her, trying to reassure her as Mills stepped onto the dock, a gun against his victim's temple.

"Mills, you don't wanna do this!" Rossi reasoned, trying to talk the killer down.

"Let me through!" Mills shouted, his way back to shore blocked by the agents.

"You know we can't do that!" Rossi yelled back, his gun trained on Mills, looking for a clear shot.

"I'll kill her!" Jackson threatened.

"You don't wanna do that," Emily said calmly but firmly, "That's not Jessica," she pointed out, bringing up Mills' ex-wife that Garcia had discovered.

"Don't talk about that bitch! You don't know what she did to me!" Mills shouted, furious.

"We do. I've got three ex-wives," Rossi said, trying to relate to the murderer. "They're all crazy. I know it hurts when they leave you, but you'll find out you're better off."

"You didn't want her to stay, anyway," Emily added. "You know she always belittled you and made you feel worthless."

"She didn't treat you like a man," Rossi said, "she treated you like a child. You're better off now. She'll realize that and that'll be pain enough for her."

"You don't have to kill these women," Emily persuaded. "She is not Jessica. She has a fiancé at home and she has no intention of belittling him or leaving him. Right, Marcia?" Emily asked the terrified woman.

Marcia nodded frantically, looking up at her captor with pleading in her eyes.

"Let her go home to him," Rossi said, calmly, stepping toward the criminal. "Jessica left you. I know it hurts. But let her go home to him. His name is Paul. He deserves a better wife than Jessica was to you. And so do you. Let her go, Jackson."

Jackson looked from Marcia to the agents and back again. Finally, he pushed the woman toward Emily and stood straighter.

"I may deserve better, but I wanted her," Jackson said in a broken voice, aiming the gun at his own temple.

Emily barely had time to shout "No!" before the pistol fired and Mills' body fell into the ocean.

"You're safe now. It's okay." Emily said to Marcia, trying to ignore the sick image of the corpse floating in the water, blood spilling out around it.

Backup arrived at that moment and EMTs came to take Marcia and Mills away.

"Good work, guys," Hotch said once he had been filled in on the events. "I got us a hotel for the night. I figured we could use a good night's sleep and everyone seems to love the Jersey shore. So tomorrow we can do some sight-seeing and the jet will take off around 9 tomorrow evening."

"That sounds great!" Emily said, shocked by this uncharacteristic gesture from Hotch.

"Let's go back to the hotel before I change my mind," Hotch said with a small smile before leading them back to the cars.


	4. Chapter 4

As Emily approached the room she and JJ would be sharing, she once again overheard the blonde talking on the phone.

"I'm sorry, it's just another day." Emily heard as she unlocked the door.

"It wasn't my call. Hotch said - … no… No, I swear…I'm sharing the room with Emily." Emily paused in closing the door upon hearing her name. Who was JJ talking to and why did they need to know that she'd be in the hotel room with JJ?

"It's not like that…I promise it's not…no I didn't mean- …okay…okay, I'm sorry…I'm sorry…yes…okay…I will…I…yeah…love you too…bye." Upon hearing the end of the phone call, Emily shut the door, announcing her presence and causing JJ to spin around quickly.

"Hey," Emily greeted.

"Hi," JJ responded quietly, ducking her head and running a hand over her face. Were those tears she was wiping away?

"Sorry for eavesdropping. I didn't want to interrupt," Emily said awkwardly.

"Oh no. No problem," JJ assured her hurriedly.

"So…who was that?" Emily asked, attempting to mask how curious she was. Who was making JJ cry?

"Oh, just Will. I was telling him about the extra days. He…he misses me. We miss each other." JJ told her hesitantly. Emily felt her heart fall slightly like it did every time she heard JJ talk about her love for Will.

"Oh." Emily said, dejectedly. "Got it."

"Yeah," JJ responded, too distracted with her phone to notice Emily's change in demeanor. The phone in question was buzzing again. After several notifications, JJ finally silenced it and put it by her bed.

"It's late," Emily commented, glancing at the 2:14 AM glaring from the red letters of the hotel clock.

"Oh. Yeah," JJ said, awkwardly. Emily was starting to feel uncomfortable at how forced this interaction had become. They usually conversed comfortably and easily. She could tell something was bothering JJ.

"You okay, Jayje?" Emily asked, gently.

"Me? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired." JJ brushed off.

"You sure? Everything okay with you and Will?" Emily prodded.

"Yeah! Totally. Will? I just miss him. Like I said. That's all." JJ said, not meeting Emily's eyes. Emily was suspicious at JJ's caginess but couldn't help the small burst of happiness at the reason for her suspicions. Maybe JJ wasn't as happy with Will as she seemed.

"Alright," Emily said, still unsure, "well, you ready to go to sleep?"

"Yeah. Night, Em." JJ responded, settling herself into bed.

"Good night, JJ," Emily whispered, wishing, as she always did when she went to sleep, that she and JJ were in the same bed, cuddling next to one another.


	5. Chapter 5

**Warning: Nightmares, fear**

* * *

"No…" it was a sound, barely more than a whisper. At first, Emily figured she must've imagined it. But then, "no, please," the whimper came again, drifting from JJ's lips like a breath. Emily sat up, looking over at the blonde and trying to figure out what was going on. She was still groggy with sleep; a glance at the clock told her it had only been a couple of hours.

"NO!" That woke her up. JJ's piercing scream tore through the room and Emily was immediately out of bed, beside the blonde.

"JJ! JJ, wake up. Come on, honey. Wake up." Emily tried desperately to get JJ out of the hell she was clearly experiencing.

"No! No please! Stop! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please!" JJ cried in her sleep, her body thrashing and her face scrunched up in agony and terror. Emily knew it probably wasn't the best thing to do, but JJ's movements were becoming awfully dangerous for both of them. She pinned JJ's arms down, trying her best to keep the blonde from hurting herself with the wild movements.

"JJ!" Emily screamed as the blonde writhed underneath her. It took all Emily's strength to keep JJ from punching one of them. She used the blankets to smother JJ's arms, doing her best not to harm the woman as she tried to protect her. "JJ, baby! Please! Wake up!" Emily shouted, terrified at the scene she was witnessing!

"NO!" JJ gave one final shriek and her eyes flew open. She continued writhing, unsure of where she was and still in the terror of the dream.

Emily jumped off of her, trying not to scare the blonde. JJ's eyes darted around the room like a rabbit looking for the fox. Her whole body trembled as her chest was wracked with desperate breaths.

"Hey," Emily said softly, turning on the light so JJ could see her surroundings. Emily was panting, herself, trying to shake off her own terror from witnessing the blonde in so much pain. "Hey, it's okay. You're in a hotel in Atlantic City." Emily told her, trying to help JJ come back to reality. "Hotch said we could spend a few nights here after we finished the case. It's just me in here with you. We had to partner up. But there's no one else. It's just Emily. You're safe." She said as the blonde finally turned to look at her. JJ's eyes feasted upon Emily as the only sense of safety she could find. Emily continued repeating small facts about their surroundings and sweet nothings in a calm, soothing voice until, finally, she found JJ's mind connect with her eyes.

"Emily," JJ breathed, recognition dawning in her face. JJ closed her eyes and leaned back into bed, "Emily. It's Emily." JJ whispered to herself as though trying to convince herself.

"That's right, honey," Emily said, "it's just me. Do you mind if I come sit beside you?" JJ shook her head and scooted over slightly to give Emily space. The brunette immediately moved to sit beside the woman she loved so much.

JJ's hand reached for Emily, as though of its own accord. JJ's fingers clenched around her friend's shirt, desperate for the feeling of realness.

A knock on the door sent a wave of panic through JJ once more. She jerked her arms into herself, still holding onto Emily, who promptly tumbled on top of the other woman.

"Hey, it's just a knock. It's probably one of the team wondering if you're alright," Emily said, grunting from the shock of being wrenched chest to chest with the woman she loved. This wasn't exactly how she had imagined it happening.

Another knock and JJ pulled Emily closer, hiding her whole body in Emily's warmth and security. "You guys okay?" Morgan's voice came through the door, "we heard a scream."

"See it's just Morgan." Emily soothed, "I'm gonna call back to him, okay?" she whispered to JJ. Upon JJ's nod, Emily shouted, "Yeah, Derek. It's all good. Sorry for the scare!"

"Alright…" Morgan said hesitantly, "Let me know if you need anything," he told them before walking away.

The loud voices had given JJ even more anxiety and Emily found herself practically burying the blonde beneath her own body.

"Hey, JJ. It's okay now," she whispered to the lump in the blankets beneath her. Gently, Emily moved her hand to let her fingers brush against the golden locks peeking out from beneath the duvet.

Emily's hand moved slowly downward, pushing the blankets away from JJ's face and exposing the anxious woman.

"It's okay now," Emily repeated, looking into those beautiful blue eyes. Her heart broke at the view of JJ so terrified but she couldn't help but relish in the closeness between the two of them.

Without thinking, Emily leaned down and kissed the blonde softly on her forehead. After a moment she pulled back and jerked her eyes open, realizing what she'd done. She saw JJ's eyes were closed and tried to calm her breathing. It'd be fine. JJ would just think it was platonic. She'd kissed JJ's forehead and cheek before. It would be fine. She tried to assure herself. But part of her knew there was more emotion in that simple action than any before it.

"Um…you feeling any better?" Emily asked, trying to redirect her attention from her awkwardness.

"Yeah, sorry about that," JJ muttered, clearly embarrassed.

"Do you want me to go back to bed?" Emily asked, trying to figure out how to help the blonde most.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you," JJ said, a wave of guilt overwhelming her.

"It's not a problem. We all get nightmares sometimes. But, uh, Jayje?" Emily assured.

"Yeah?" JJ asked, those stunning eyes looking back into Emily's and making the brunette's heart skip a beat.

"Uh…well…uh…you're kinda holding me," Emily finally managed to get the words out.

"Oh! Sorry," JJ responded quickly, startled and embarrassed. She quickly released her death grip on Emily. "Sorry," JJ repeated, turning around curling herself into a ball.

"Are you gonna be okay going back to sleep?" Emily asked worriedly.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine," JJ assured her, but Emily could see her shaking, the occasional sob emphasizing her trembling.

"Oh stop being the hero," Emily said, teasingly. For the second time that night, Emily should have consulted her brain before she followed her heart, but she didn't. The brunette climbed into JJ's bed next to the smaller woman and pulled the blonde into her arms. She froze after a moment, realizing what she'd done.

After a few minutes of utter stillness, JJ turned in Emily's arms and nestled into the other woman's warmth. Emily breathed a sigh of relief and adoration and held onto JJ a little tighter, stroking her hair as the blonde drifted to sleep.

Soon, Emily had followed suit, unable to resist the comfort and relaxation JJ gave her. Just as she was about to drift into unconsciousness, it occurred to her that while trying to help JJ, she'd forgotten all about the dream. Who was JJ pleading with? Emily supposed it would have to wait for another time.


	6. Chapter 6

**Warning: Nothing really...lying? Financial Hardship?**

* * *

Emily awoke to a sense of warmth and utter contentment. For a moment, she lay there, basking in the comfort. Eventually, she began to remember the events of the previous night and realized what exactly was causing her so much happiness.

Emily opened her eyes to see JJ's peaceful form sleeping millimeters from her. She smiled at the beautiful sight of the blonde and closed her eyes again, relishing in the moment. She wanted to stay there all day, holding the woman she loved. Unfortunately, she soon realized that the choice was not up to her as she felt JJ tense in her arms.

Emily reopened her eyes to watch as JJ's fluttered open to meet her. She saw something clouded in the blue orbs for a moment before they focused on Emily. Could that have been fear that Emily saw? Who was she afraid of? The attacker from her dream? Or even Emily herself?

JJ gave a small smile, bringing Emily out of her thoughts.

"Hey," Emily said, smiling back at the blonde. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah. I slept great after…you know," JJ responded, glancing down in obvious embarrassment.

"That's great. I'm glad," Emily said with a reassuring smile. "So, do you wanna get something to eat? It's already…man it's already 11:00!" Emily exclaimed after glancing at the clock on the bedside table.

"Really? Already?" JJ said, her eyes going wide, the emotion clouding over them once more. Emily was sure now that it was fear.

"Hey, it's okay. We don't have to go into work or anything. We got the day off, remember? The jet doesn't leave until tonight." Emily said, looking at JJ in concern.

"Oh…yeah," JJ said, a relieved smile crossing her face, but Emily could see the fear still there in her eyes.

"I'm gonna go take a shower and then maybe we can go out to breakfast," Emily suggested, deciding to give JJ some privacy to work through whatever was bothering her.

"Yeah. Sounds good," JJ replied, though she was clearly distracted as she looked at her phone.

"Wow, that's a lot of texts!" Emily said in surprise, noticing JJ scroll through the notifications on her lock screen. "Who's so obsessed with you, Miss Popular?" She joked, but JJ didn't seem to find it funny. The blonde pulled the phone to her, as though trying to hide the texts from Emily, and Emily could see terror etched into every line of her friend's face.

"No one!" JJ said quickly, "It's just Will trying to figure out when I'll be home. That's all. He's not obsessed. He just cares about me."

"Okay…" Emily replied slowly, extremely concerned by JJ's behavior. "Is everything okay, JJ?" She asked, deciding to confront the issue slightly.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. It's fine." JJ responded, avoiding Emily's eyes. "Why do you ask?" she said, trying to be nonchalant but Emily could still hear the wavering note of fear in her voice.

"You haven't been seeming like yourself lately. I'm worried about you." Emily explained.

"I'm fine. I've just had a lot going on," JJ said, still refusing to meet Emily's gaze.

"Like what?" Emily pressed.

"Oh, you know. We've just had some tough cases lately. And Will lost his job so we've been a little stressed financially and he gets really bored when I'm not around," JJ explained.

"Oh, Jen, I had no idea," Emily responded, shocked that JJ hadn't said anything, "why didn't you tell me?"

"It's embarrassing," JJ brushed off, "and Will didn't want anyone to know."

"Okay, well I'm here if you need anything, alright?" Emily assured the blonde, wrapping her arms around her friend in a strong hug.

"Thanks, Em," JJ said, leaning into the taller woman's form.

"Anytime, Jayje. Now I'm gonna go take that shower, okay? And why don't you call Will and tell him to get a dog to keep him entertained while you're gone," Emily joked, trying to lighten the mood. She was rewarded with a light chuckle from JJ before the brunette headed into the bathroom.

She was halfway through her shower before she realized that some financial problems didn't explain JJ's dream or her fear.


	7. Chapter 7

**Warning: Implied abuse, violence**

* * *

Emily spent the day with her team, exploring the boardwalk and enjoying the sights. They even went down to the beach for a while and Morgan convinced everyone but Hotch and JJ to get in the water. Soon enough, they were finishing dinner and it was time to head to the jet.

Emily had been keeping a close eye on JJ throughout the day, but she was starting to get the sense that the blonde was deliberately avoiding her. Even once they got on the jet, JJ jumped deep into conversation with Morgan, so any chance Emily may have had to speak with her in private was lost.

It was near midnight when the team finally got back to the BAU. Most of the team took off immediately. Hotch went straight to his office to write up the case report, which left Emily and JJ, both being workaholics, grabbing some files to bring home and work on that night.

Emily decided to confront JJ in her office and headed up to see the blonde. She was greeted with the sight of JJ hanging up the phone and putting her head in her hands.

"Hey, you okay?" Emily asked, looking at her friend with concern. JJ shot up immediately and desperately tried to yank her sleeves down. That's when Emily saw it. "JJ, what was that," she demanded.

"Nothing, nothing. I'm fine. I should head home it's late." JJ said quickly, busying herself with the files on her desk.

"Jennifer," Emily said gently, stilling JJ's hands with her own. "You have bruises on your arm, let me see," Emily implored, but she didn't wait for an answer. Long fingers slid the sleeve up the blonde woman's arm before stilling completely, unmoving as stone. "Who did this," Emily said, staring at the sight before her.

"Nothing. It's no one." JJ said quickly, yanking her arm out of Emily's grasp and pulling her sleeve down once more. Emily was frozen in shock and fury. By the time she snapped out of her reverie, JJ was gone but the image in Emily's mind was not – the image of a large hand silhouetted by dark bruising around JJ's wrist.


	8. Chapter 8

**Warning: mentions of abuse, violence.**

* * *

JJ didn't show up for work the next day. Or the day after. Emily's calls were sent straight to voicemail and her texts were left unread. She knew she should probably tell the team what she saw, but she couldn't. She told herself that she wanted to be certain of what was going on before causing unnecessary anxiety, but the real reason was more selfish. She didn't want to risk her friendship with JJ any more than she already had. She couldn't stand the idea of losing the blonde. Maybe a small part of her even wanted to keep it a secret between the two of them. Maybe a small part of her wanted to play the hero, be the one to save JJ, and maybe, just maybe, get a chance to be even closer to the woman of her dreams.

Hotch told the team that JJ was taking a few of her boundless saved up personal days, but Emily knew this was more than just a vacation.

At the end of the second day, Hotch was planning to bring JJ some files that the blonde had apparently requested in order to stay on top of the mounting pile on her desk. Emily jumped at the chance, immediately offering to take the files to JJ herself.

"Thanks, Prentiss," Hotch agreed easily, "I've got to fill out a team progress report for Strauss anyway."

Emily nearly ran out the door and was in her car on the way to JJ's house within 5 minutes. Barely 10 minutes after that, she'd arrived.

Beside herself with excitement, Emily bounded up the steps to the front door. She couldn't wait to see the blonde again, even if her friend wasn't too happy with her at the moment. Her free hand reached up to knock but froze when she heard a commotion inside.

"Shut up, you whiny bitch!" A voice was shouting from the other side of the door. "You ungrateful, good for nothing piece of shit! You should be happy that I even let you out of the house! Especially when we both know you'd open those whore legs to anyone that wanted!"

"Will, I never –," A new, quieter voice began to speak but it was cut off by the dull smack of skin against skin. That was JJ's voice. Emily could recognize it anywhere. But Will? That was Will shouting those awful things? To JJ? Her JJ? Emily couldn't take it anymore, she pounded on the door, desperate to figure out what was going on.

With the announcement of her presence, Emily heard the noises inside immediately cease. Quiet murmuring was the only thing audible for a few moments until finally, the door swung open. Will stood on the other side, beaming with charm so convincing, Emily wondered if she had imagined the whole fight.

"Emily!" The southern man said, "what a pleasant surprise!"

"Hey, Will," Emily responded uncertainly; the man in front of her seemed far too kind to have shouted those awful things at JJ. "I was looking for JJ."

"Oh of course, of course," Will replied with a smile, opening the door further and inviting Emily in. "Jennifer is in the bathroom right now. She should be out any moment. Honey, Emily's here to see you. It looks like she brought some files," Will explained, raising his voice for the last few sentences so JJ could hear him.

"Just a moment! I'll be right down!" Emily heard JJ respond from upstairs. Upstairs? Emily was certain JJ had just been downstairs in a screaming match with Will. How had she gotten upstairs so quickly? A few seconds later, a blonde head poked out from the top of the stairs. "Hey, Emily," JJ called down with a slight smile.

"I'll give you two some privacy," Will told them as JJ walked downstairs. "I'll be just upstairs if you need anything, chére," he added, giving the blonde a kiss on the cheek as he passed her. Emily saw JJ's eyes close and some emotion cross her face. Was that fear? Was she afraid of Will? Or was it resignation at having to talk to Emily again?

"Hey, JJ," Emily said, smiling softly at the blonde.

"Hey," JJ repeated. "So, you brought files?" the woman asked after a brief pause.

"Oh! Yeah. Here." Emily handed the files over. "I know Hotch was supposed to bring them but he's gotta do some report for Strauss and I offered. I wanted to apologize. For the other day. I just…I care about you, JJ. And if something's going on, I want to be there to help."

"I know, Em. And I appreciate that. But everything's fine." JJ insisted.

"I heard you guys fighting before I walked in," Emily admitted in a low voice, making sure Will wouldn't be able to hear from upstairs.

"Oh, that was nothing. He's just been under a lot of stress with the whole job thing," JJ brushed off.

"It didn't sound like nothing," Emily pressed, "he had no right to say those things to you." JJ ducked her head, avoiding Emily's gaze. "Is that where the bruises came from? Did he hurt you Jayje?"

JJ's continued refusal to look at the brunette was all the information Emily needed. "He did, didn't he?" Emily realized in horror. "That's why you've been so reticent! How long has this been going on?" Emily took JJ's hands gently in her own as the blonde finally looked up at her, tears shining in blue eyes. Emily could feel warmth in her own eyes as she finally understood the pain her best friend had been in. The woman she loved had been in hell and Emily had missed it. How could she let this happen?

JJ opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by the sound of footsteps.

"You two have been awfully quiet," Will said with a bright smile as he appeared on the stairs. Emily saw JJ's eyes flash with fear and gave her hands a quick, reassuring squeeze before letting go and stepping back, composing herself to ensure Will had no clue of what had just transpired.

"Yeah, just having a girly moment," Emily said with a small chuckle and an equally charming smile to the man she hated more than anything in the world.

"Well, JJ and I are gonna get some dinner soon. I'm tryin' to get her to relax for once, but she just had to have someone bring her work home for her. She can never take a break, this one," He drawled, wrapping an arm around the blonde who visibly tensed.

"I should give you some time alone, then," Emily said reluctantly. She couldn't do anything in front of Will, not when it could put her friend in danger. "I'll see you at work tomorrow, though, Jayje. Strauss is starting to get worried and you know when she gets worried, she gets angry," Emily added, hoping this would give JJ an excuse to get away from Will.

"Oh, okay," JJ said hesitantly. "I'll try to make it in."

"And give me a call later," Emily requested, "Garcia's trying to plan another girls' night sometime this weekend so I've been given the duty of figuring out when you're free," she said with a playful roll of her eyes, desperately trying to give JJ as many opportunities as possible to get to safety.

"Okay," JJ repeated. "I'll talk to you later."

"See ya, Jay," Emily told her with a smile as she walked toward the door. "Oh, and nice seeing you as always, William," she added, throwing a possibly too exaggerated smile over her shoulder as she let herself out. She'd have to find a way to get JJ to safety, and the sooner the better. She couldn't believe this had been going on right under her nose. JJ. Her JJ, getting hurt by that bastard. How could she have missed it?

Emily could barely wait for the phone call that night. Maybe they could start making a plan to get JJ out. Emily vowed to herself that she wouldn't let this go on any longer. She may have missed it for who knows how long, but now she would do everything she could to make it right.


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning: Mentions of abuse, violence**

* * *

Emily didn't receive a call last night. Instead, she got a short text, "can't talk. C u tmrw."

Emily groaned and threw her head back onto the pillow. What does "can't talk" mean? Is JJ in trouble? Of course, Emily realized, JJ was in trouble every second she spent with that monster who called himself her boyfriend. I should've seen it, Emily berated herself, infuriated by her own ineptitude. She spent the night hating herself for missing the signs and debating whether to go over to JJ's house. When she finally fell asleep from utter exhaustion, she was plagued by nightmares.

"This is your fault!" JJ said in Emily's dream, "How could you have missed it? I was waiting for you to see it! I needed you to see it!"

"You did this," Will told Emily in another dream. He yanked JJ forward by her hair and Emily saw scars and bruises covering the blonde.

"Why didn't you help me?" The broken and battered JJ begged in a small voice.

"You did this!" Will repeated, raising a fist and raining hits and kicks on the already injured woman that he was supposed to love.

"No, no, no!" Emily repeated over and over, horrified at what was happening.

"Mrrroooow!" Sergio said, pawing at Emily. "Mrrroowww!" he repeated, more insistently. Emily felt a pressure on her face and opened her eyes. Staring back at her were the green eyes of a hungry cat.

"I'm awake! I'm awake, Sergio," assuring her cat as much as herself about that fact. Her heart was racing from her dreams. She wondered if Sergio had noticed her in distress, but as she glanced at the clock she realized it was already 7:30; of course, Sergio was just ready to be fed.

Slowly, Emily stood up, sliding her feet into her slippers and shuffling out her bedroom door. She felt terrible, both from exhaustion and guilt.

Once the cat had been fed and Emily was dressed, she headed out the door to begin what was promising to be an agonizingly slow day.

"You look like hell!" Morgan told her as Emily entered the bullpen.

"Gee, thanks," Emily responded, casting a tired glance back at her tormentor.

"Well I dunno what's got you so down, but I know that a certain special blonde might be able to cheer you up," Morgan told her, and Emily's eyes shot up. In her daze, she had completely forgotten that JJ had promised to come in today. "She's in her office," Morgan told her with a chuckle, noticing Emily's excitement.

"Thanks, Morgan!" Emily called over her shoulder, already practically sprinting to where she knew JJ would be.

"JJ!" Emily exclaimed as she barged into JJ's office. "Oh my god, JJ! Are you okay?"

JJ jumped at the sudden interruption, staring anxiously at Emily before calming down again, sighing in resignation at the conversation to come.

"Close the door, would you?" JJ requested. Emily did so, pulling the blinds as she did before taking a seat on the couch across from JJ's desk.

"Are you okay? Why didn't you call me last night?" Emily asked, a little calmer now.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine," JJ said, staring at her file. "I was too busy to call. Getting ready for work today and everything."

"Hey," Emily whispered, pausing until JJ looked up at her. "I know now. I know what's been going on. You don't have to pretend anymore." She spoke gently, walking around JJ's desk and kneeling in front of the blonde. "I'm here, now, Jen."

And then the waterworks started. JJ's resolve broke as she stared into those dark brown eyes so full of love and caring. JJ hadn't seen such kindness in months. Her walls came crashing down and her eyes filled with tears. She fell into Emily's waiting embrace and sobbed. She cried for the pain she felt. She cried for her lost innocence. She cried because Emily had found out. She cried for what Will would do now. She cried for reasons she didn't even understand. She just curled up in Emily's lap, crying for what her life had become.

Emily, for her part, held the blonde securely. She gently swapped places with JJ so she was sitting in the chair with the smaller woman on her lap. Long fingers trailed through blonde locks. Loving words tickled a pale ear.

"I love you," Emily cooed to the distraught woman. "I'm so sorry this happened. I'm here now. I'm so sorry. It's all gonna be okay now. I'm here, angel. I'm here."

They stayed like that for about 30 minutes. Long after JJ's sobs had dissipated, Emily kept rubbing her back and stroking her hair, whispering soft words of comfort to the blonde.

Finally, the pair broke apart, JJ removing her head from its place tucked beneath Emily's chin.

"Do you want to talk?" Emily prodded gently.

"He's gonna kill me, Em," JJ whispered fearfully.

"I'm not gonna let that happen," Emily assured her quickly.

"No, you don't get it," the blonde insisted desperately. "He's going to kill me! He told me so! He said if anyone found out or if I told anyone that he'd kill them and then me! Oh god! He's going to kill you!" JJ said, her panic mounting.

"No, he won't," Emily maintained. "We'll get you out of there. We're the FBI. We can protect you."

"No!" JJ shouted, standing up quickly, "No, I can't leave him."

"What?" Emily asked, blinking in surprise, "Why on earth not?"

"I can't…" JJ ducked, avoiding the brunette's gaze, "He has everything. It's all in his name, Emily. He told me it'd make him feel better to have the financial accounts in his name because he felt emasculated since I make more money." The blonde rambled, closing her eyes as she recounted the memory.

"It's okay, honey. It's gonna be okay." Emily told her, standing before the smaller woman and gently cupping the blonde's cheek. Emily's heart fluttered when JJ leaned into her touch, but she had to stay focused. "You can come stay with me and I'll help you until you can get back on your feet."

"You'd do that?" JJ asked, wide-eyed. Emily nodded, moving closer to the blonde to look into the blue eyes that met her own. "No…" JJ whispered, "No. I can't do that to you," JJ repeated with more force. "He's gonna kill you, Em…"

"No, he won't. I won't let him. We'll take out a restraining order. He assaulted a federal agent. We'll tell the team and have him arrested." Emily planned, trying to calm JJ down.

"No! No, please don't tell the team. Please, Em. They'll hate me," JJ said, terror in her eyes.

"They could never hate you, JJ. None of this is your fault." Emily insisted, her heart breaking at the look in JJ's eyes. "But we don't have to tell them yet. Could you at least stay with me for a while, so we can decide what to do?" Emily asked, hopefully.

"I…okay," JJ responded, hesitantly, looking into the sincerity of Emily's gaze. "Promise you don't mind?"

"I promise, angel," Emily told her, wrapping JJ once more in her strong embrace. "I promise," the brunette repeated, vowing then and there to keep JJ safe for the rest of her life.


	10. Chapter 10

**Warning: Reference to abuse**

* * *

Emily spent the rest of the day thinking about JJ. She knew the circumstances were far from ideal, but she couldn't help the joy that spread through her at the thought of living with the blonde and getting to help the woman she loved.

After many agonizing hours, it was finally time to go.

"You ready?" Emily asked JJ, knocking on her office door

"Just about," JJ replied, examining the last pages of a file. After a moment, she looked up at Emily.

"You wanna ride together?" Emily offered.

"That's okay. You go on," JJ told her, looking back at the files. "I'm gonna finish up here and then I'll drop by my house and grab some stuff."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Emily asked, concerned.

"It'll be fine," JJ brushed off. "He'll probably be passed out anyway. And if he isn't I'll just tell him we're having a girls' night or something. You mentioned yesterday we were gonna."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Emily prodded, unconvinced.

"No." JJ said quickly before repeating, softer and gentler, "no. Sorry, that came out wrong. It's just…if he sees you there," Emily could see JJ was nervous, biting her lip and avoiding Emily's gaze.

"Why would he mind me being there?" Emily asked, confused.

JJ continued to hesitate, clearly agitated, "he…well…" she muttered before finally ranting in one long breath, "After yesterday, he sort of got it in his head that there was something going on between us and I told him it wasn't true but he won't drop it now that he's thought of it, he won't let it go and I'm sorry Em, I told him it wasn't true but he just…he didn't believe me…I'm sorry." She finished quietly.

Emily was stunned. She couldn't deny that she had feelings for the blonde, but she'd been so careful! Had she let something slip? Did Will find out somehow?

"Em?" JJ whispered anxiously, "Em, are you okay?"

"What?" Emily started, shaken from her worries. "Oh. Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Just…that's just weird. Why would he think that?"

"I don't know…" JJ admitted, "I mean…I told him I was bisexual a few weeks ago…so maybe that has something to do with it," JJ said, avoiding Emily's eyes even more so now.

JJ paused a moment before beginning to ramble once more, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I just didn't know how you'd react and I didn't want you to hate me. Do you hate me? I get it if you don't want me to stay with you I'll just go home I'm sorry I shouldn't've said anything I- "

"Hey," Emily interrupted, putting a hand on JJ's shoulder, "It's okay. No, I don't hate you. And of course you're still gonna stay with me. I know you're bisexual, Morgan told me."

"You do? He did?" JJ asked, finally meeting Emily's eyes.

"Yeah. Don't get mad at him, though. He was just trying to reassure me." Emily explained.

"Reassure you about what?" JJ inquired, confused.

Emily cursed herself, realizing she couldn't say the real reason, "I…uh," she began, inventing quickly, "I was worried about how you'd react if I told you that I'm gay."

"You're gay?" JJ repeated in shock.

"Yeah. Well, technically I'm bi, but I lean toward women." Emily elaborated.

"Oh…" JJ muttered, still stunned.

"Anyway," Emily said awkwardly, "so you'll stop by your house, grab some stuff, and then meet me at mine?"

"Uh…" JJ whispered, shaking herself from her thoughts, "Yeah. Yeah, sounds good."

"But promise you'll call me if you need anything," Emily pleaded, uncomfortable with JJ being near Will again.

"I…" JJ hesitated, but upon meeting Emily's desperate gaze, she agreed. "Okay. I will, I promise."

Emily smiled and gave JJ a quick hug before they both headed down to the garage. Just a little longer, Emily thought. Just a little longer and she'd know for a fact that JJ was safe.


	11. Chapter 11

**Warning: Language, homophobia, implications of violence, abuse**

* * *

Emily spent 20 minutes bouncing from couch to kitchen to bedroom and back. She couldn't stay still; she was too worried about JJ. How long could it take for her to get stuff and leave? She considered going to JJ's house, but she didn't want to put the blonde in more danger.

She thought about what JJ had said. Will thought there was something going on between them? Yeah, right. Emily could only dream and dream she did. She couldn't remember the last time she'd slept without JJ dominating her subconscious. For that matter, she couldn't remember the last time JJ wasn't dominating her consciousness! Thoughts of living with JJ, cooking for JJ, cuddling with JJ, sleeping next to JJ, sleeping with JJ… Luckily Emily never had outward signs of her dreams, so she didn't have to worry about JJ hearing such interesting noises.

She remembered the first time she had a…private dream. She'd panicked. She'd known she had feelings for JJ, but she hadn't realized how far they had gotten. She had tried so hard to suppress them.

Over the next few weeks, they became increasingly common. On the first case after she'd had the dream, JJ and Emily had shared a hotel room. Emily tried to stay awake, but the case had taken so much out of her, she'd finally dozed off…and had another dream.

The moment they returned from the case, Emily had set up a sound monitor in her room, desperate to learn what JJ might've heard. Over the next few weeks, she anxiously poured over the recordings, looking for any signs of her dreams. Soon she was even videotaping herself as she slept, checking and double-checking to make sure she hadn't given everything away to JJ.

Eventually, she was satisfied. No matter what was going on in her head, Emily, awake or asleep, showed no outward signs.

Emily was broken out of her thoughts by the sharp ringing of her cellphone.

"Prentiss," she answered, suddenly all business.

"Emily, it's me." Whispered the panicked voice through the phone. JJ.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Emily asked, already grabbing her keys and heading out the door. JJ said she'd call if she was in trouble, and from the terror seeping through the line, she was.

"It's Will. He – ," JJ was cut off by a loud banging.

"You bitch! I'm gonna fucking kill you! Get out here, you piece of shit!" Will's voice thundered through the receiver as Emily fumbled frantically with her keys, finally starting her car and speeding toward JJ.

"I'm on my way," she told her friend, the phone on speaker.

"Please hurry!" JJ begged, frantically.

"What the fuck are you saying?" Will's voice boomed from Emily's phone. "Talk to me, you bitch! Haven't I taught you enough respect? When will you learn, damn it? Do as I fucking say!"

"Emily…" JJ's broken voice could barely be heard over Will's rage. "Emily, I'm scared…"

Emily's heart broke. Her foot was pressed against the floor; she blew through at least two red lights, but she didn't care. She needed to get to JJ.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Can't you hear me, dyke?" Will was screaming. "Get out here! What, you scared of me or something? You think you're scared of me now? I'll give you something to be scared of! When I'm done with you, your faggot friend won't even recognize you! You've never known pain like what I'm gonna show you! Get out here!" Emily's panic increased with every word. If Will got to JJ…she couldn't even think about it. She grabbed her spare firearm from the glove compartment, getting ready in case she had to use it. From the sounds through the phone, she may very well have to.

The noise suddenly stopped. Will wasn't banging on the door or shouting anymore. Emily heard nothing over the phone except the terrified whimpers of JJ. Then, CRASH! Emily heard the sound of splintering wood, an ear-piercing scream, and the dull sound of the dial tone. The call had gone dead.


	12. Chapter 12

**Warning: Homophobia, graphic descriptions of violence, abuse**

* * *

It had been 5 minutes since the call had disconnected. Emily had blown through every stoplight and intersection. She was lucky there were no policemen on the road and very few cars, but she expected several tickets to arrive in her mailbox shortly. She didn't care, though. She had to get to JJ.

Finally, Emily pulled up to JJ's house, barely managing to turn off the car before she got out, gun drawn.

She found the door unlocked and quietly crept inside. Her plan of surprising Will quickly went out the window when she heard a scream from the second floor. She sprinted up the stairs and through the door to the bedroom.

The sight that greeted Emily was one she would never forget. Will was crouched over JJ's bleeding and broken form, striking her repeatedly as she cried out in pain, begging him to stop. Emily could see a large cut over JJ's eyebrow, bruises covering her arms. JJ's dark blue shirt was torn but the skin beneath it was mostly the same color. Emily couldn't see the full damage because Will was blocking her view, still landing hits.

Emily saw red. Seconds after Emily had entered the room, Will had been yanked off of JJ and pinned against the wall. Emily's gun dug into the small of his back, daring him to move, and her free hand held the back of his neck, pressing his face against the plaster. In her rage, Emily tried desperately to keep from killing him right then and there. She was shaken from her internal struggle by a sound she didn't expect. Will was laughing.

"So, you called your dyke friend to save you?" Will spat with amused contempt. "What'd you promise her if she helped you? Is that why you were going over there tonight? Be her fuck buddy so she'd keep pretending to care about you? You're disgusting, Jennifer, you-," Will was cut off when Emily pulled his head back and slammed it against the wall with more force.

"You shut your god damn mouth," she hissed in his ear. She reached for her handcuffs, yanking Will's hands behind his back and cuffing them a little too tightly. "William La Montagne Jr. You are under arrest for domestic violence and the assault of a federal agent. I'd read you your rights, but you'll rot in a cell with or without an interrogation. If you value your life, you won't move an inch." She gave him a last press against the wall and hurrying to JJ's side.

"Emily," JJ said in a pained whisper.

Emily was already on the phone, 911 dialed. "Yes, this is Agent Emily Prentiss with the FBI BAU. I need backup and a bus at 1416 Fuller Road. Domestic dispute. A fellow agent has been injured. Please hurry." She hung up and turned her attention to JJ, "hey, you're gonna be okay. Just hang in there, Jayje." JJ reached a hand up weakly and caressed Emily's cheek as Emily took stock of JJ's condition.

JJ had bruises covering her, new ones layered over old ones. Her skin was mottled with scars in varying degrees of healing. Her arm and leg were bent at unnatural angles and Emily could hear the agony in her breathing, indicating at least one broken rib. She was in a lot of pain, but she was alive, and Emily thanked her lucky stars for that.


	13. Chapter 13

**Warning: Reference to abuse**

**Remember, you have the right to doctor-patient confidentiality. Some doctors do not always respect this, but if you're in a similar situation, talk to your doctor about who they may share information with. If you're concerned for doctors disrespecting the rule in the future, talk to your primary care physician about ways you can ensure that other doctors will heed the rule (note in your medical file, perhaps)**

* * *

Emily was in the hospital waiting room. Will had been taken into custody and she'd called the team, who were on their way.

The cushioned chairs had long since become uncomfortable and her mind was overwhelmed with guilt.

How could she miss this? Emily asked herself. She should've seen it! How did she not see it? And tonight…she knew Will might do something stupid and she'd still let JJ go alone. How could she let JJ go alone? How could she leave JJ alone whenever the blonde needed her most? How could Emily call herself JJ's friend? Someone who loved JJ beyond what was normal for a friend? She couldn't even keep the woman she loved safe.

"Emily!" A colored shape bustled toward the brunette, breaking her from her reverie.

"Hey, Pen," Emily responded sadly.

"What happened? What's going on? You didn't say much on the phone…" Garcia inquired.

"It's JJ. She was hurt. She's gonna be fine, though. Just some bumps and bruises and they took her into surgery for internal bleeding. But she's gonna be fine." Emily assured her friend. Physically fine, at least, she added to herself.

"How'd she get hurt?" Morgan asked as he and Reid joined the pair.

"Uh…" Emily started, unsure whether to tell them or not.

"What's going on?" Hotch demanded as he and Rossi completed the group, effectively saving Emily from her uncomfortable position, at least temporarily. "Where's JJ?" He added, eliminating Emily's reprieve.

"Guys, I-," Emily tried, at a loss for what to say.

"Here for Jennifer Jareau?" A doctor spoke, turning the team's attention from Emily once more.

"That's us," Morgan told him.

"Good," The doctor responded, eying the group over the reading glasses he was using to examine JJ's chart. "My name is Doctor James Wherren." He announced, tucking the chart beneath his arm. "Is one of you Emily Prentiss?"

"That's me!" Emily told him anxiously.

"Ah," he replied, nodding. "Well, JJ has been asking to speak with you. Could you follow me please?" He didn't wait for an answer as he turned to lead Emily to JJ.

"Hang on a second," Morgan demanded, causing the doctor to turn around once more. "Aren't you going to tell us what happened?"

"I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to disclose that information," Wherren told him.

"Not at liberty- what? She's our friend!" Morgan responded, aghast.

"Doctor-patient confidentiality doesn't extend to cases in which the patient is in danger, in which case the doctor is obligated to inform law-enforcement," Reid informed the group.

"We're FBI," Garcia added in a conspiratorial whisper.

"I understand that, but I have been assured that Ms. Jareau is in no danger at present." The doctor replied, calmly.

"Sir, I am the chief of her unit at the FBI," Hotch began, matching the doctor's professionalism. "When one of my agents is injured, it is imperative that I know the full extent of their injuries."

"That is true if an agent is injured on the job. If I am not mistaken, Agent Jareau was at home when these injuries occurred, thus your statement is not applicable." Wherren countered.

"Sir," Rossi tried, "you've gotta understand. We're her friends. We're as close to family as she's got. We just want to know what happened to her."

"Well then I suppose she'll have to tell you when she wishes to, but I'll have you know, I will have no tolerance for any harassment of patients under my care," Wherren replied, obviously irritated with the agents.

"All the other doctors have told us!" Garcia exclaimed, stunned that they still had no information about JJ.

"Then they don't seem to have as much respect for Ms. Jareau's dignity or privacy as I do. Or for the law, as it so happens." Wherren told them before adding in a slightly more frustrated voice, "for that matter, you don't seem to, either, regardless of how good friends you think you are with my patient. Agent Jareau is an adult and a patient. As such, she has a right to determine who knows what about her condition. You, on the other hand, do not have the right to make that decision!" He told them firmly. "Now," he added in a calmer voice, "Ms. Prentiss, please follow me." He commanded gently before turning around with finality and leading Emily down the hall. Behind him, five agents looked sheepishly at one another, realizing the doctor was right and guilty for the disrespect they had unknowingly shown their friend.


	14. Chapter 14

**Warning: Mentions of abuse, self-blame, pelvic exam**

* * *

"Emily," JJ whispered in a broken voice as the brunette walked through the door.

"JJ," Emily responded in a similar tone as she took in the sight before her. JJ's leg was raised in a sling, a cast surrounding her shin. There was a brace on her left wrist and a nurse was finishing wrapping her slim waist. Emily stared at JJ's midsection and the bruises visible between the bandages and the flimsy paper pants the hospital provided. She only broke from her thoughts when the nurse pulled JJ's shirt over the wrap to meet the matching pants.

"Oh, JJ," Emily muttered, full of guilt and pain at the sight before her.

JJ held a hand out weakly, reaching for Emily. Emily, in turn, rushed to the woman's side, gently grasping her hand and running a thumb over the blonde's knuckles.

"I'm sorry," JJ whispered after a few moments.

"Why on earth are you sorry?" Emily asked, bewildered. She had just been thinking about how sorry she was and now JJ's the one to apologize?

"You were worried something might happen…" JJ elaborated, refusing to meet Emily's gaze. "I should've listened to you. I should've told you what was happening from the beginning. I was scared. I was weak. If I hadn't been none of this would've happened."

"This is not your fault," Emily asserted with conviction. "He's the one that hurt you. You're not weak, Jayje. He made you feel like you couldn't tell anyone."

"I was worried you wouldn't believe me," JJ admitted, "he was always so charming in public. You all seemed to love him…whenever I brought up a fight we had or doubts I felt you guys would say to give it time or give him another chance…I'm not trying to blame you I just…I'm trying to explain."

"Hey, you don't have to justify anything to me," Emily assured her. "I'm sorry we weren't more supportive."

"No, it's not your fault. I should've trusted you guys," JJ insisted.

"It's not your fault either, honey," Emily told her again. They sat in silence for a while, each caught up in thoughts of self-blame.

"Ms. Jareau?" A new nurse asked as the woman walked through the door. "I'm Ms. Montgomery. The doctor has requested I…um…" she paused, noticing Emily in the room as she looked up from the chart. "I'm sorry, could I speak to Ms. Jareau alone please?"

Emily nodded and made to leave, but JJ tightened her grip on Emily's hand. "It's okay," Emily assured her, "I'll be right outside."

"No," JJ whispered before adding with more strength, "could you stay?"

"Are you sure?" Emily checked, receiving a nod from JJ. "Then, of course, sweetheart."

"Alright," the nurse began having watched the exchange. "Well, the doctor asked that I conduct a…a pelvic exam," Montgomery explained awkwardly, still uncomfortable with Emily in the room.

Emily's eyes went wide. "You mean…he…why?" She asked, horrified.

"It's just standard," the nurse explained quickly. "Just to cover all bases in domestic violence."

"Oh…" Emily muttered, not very reassured.

"Would that be alright?" The nurse asked JJ.

"I…" the blonde started anxiously. "You'll stay, right?" She asked, turning toward Emily.

"Forever," Emily told her, more serious than JJ realized.

"Okay. Okay, I'm ready," JJ said with a deep breath.

"Alright," Montgomery said with a kind smile as she stepped forward and gently lifted JJ's gown.

Emily kept her eyes fixed on JJ's throughout the exam, rubbing her thumb over the blonde's knuckles at every wince, every gasp, every grimace.

Finally, it was over. Only once JJ was fully covered again did Emily turn to the nurse.

"Well," the nurse began, addressing JJ, "the good news is that there's nothing too recent, so most injuries are pretty fully healed. It does look like you have some scarring, though. Nothing too major but be careful when you're having sex in the future. Don't forget foreplay and lube, otherwise, you may reopen the scars or cause more tears. I've been informed that the man who hurt you has been brought into custody, so I won't ask you whether or not the sex was consensual, but I do suggest you see a counselor. I'll have a list of recommendations included with your discharge papers."

Emily was desperate to know what had caused the scars, but she didn't want to invade JJ's privacy. Maybe JJ just liked it rough, she tried to reassure herself, but she remained unconvinced.

"When can I go home?" JJ was asking the nurse.

"Well, that depends." The nurse told her, smiling at the excitement that shone on the blonde's face at the prospect of leaving. "You need monitoring for a minimum of two weeks to be sure that rib doesn't puncture a lung. If someone can stay with you during that time, I'll go get the doctor and he can release you immediately. Otherwise, I'm afraid I'll have to insist that you stay here." The nurse explained.

JJ's shoulders slumped in disappointment, but Emily was already responding.

"She'll be staying with me." The brunette assured the nurse. JJ turned to Emily, wide-eyed. "You were going to, anyway," Emily responded as she noticed the look of shock on her friend's face.

"Well, yeah," JJ admitted, "but I figured…now I'd be so much work…and I was already going to make you sacrifice so much…" she explained, looking down at her hands.

"There's no sacrifice I wouldn't make for you, Jennifer," Emily told her, taking both hands from the blonde's lap and looking into her eyes. "I would give up my world to keep you safe." She insisted, realizing in her heart that the statement was entirely true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw if I have any continuity errors in this story I deeply apologize. It survived through multiple periods of multi-month-long writer's block


	15. Chapter 15

**Warning: Reference to abuse**

* * *

An hour later, JJ was moved to a wheelchair for her release, much to her chagrin.

"There is no way I'm letting you push yourself even a micrometer past what the doctor ordered," Emily warned her as she rolled JJ down the hall. JJ huffed but knew Emily was just worrying about her, so she let it slide.

"Sugarplum!" Garcia called the moment the wheelchair crossed into the waiting area. The team stood up as one and moved toward JJ.

The blonde gave a small, embarrassed smile as Garcia gently wrapped her in a hug, mindful of the injuries.

"Hey, guys." JJ said, looking down at her hands in her lap.

"We were so worried about you," Rossi supplied, trying to make her more at ease.

"I'm fine," JJ told them, still fiddling with her hands.

"The doctor wouldn't tell us what happened," Morgan mentioned. That got JJ to look up.

"Really?" She asked, barely masking the relief in her voice. "Why not?"

"He said it was an invasion of your privacy," Garcia explained. "He wouldn't even tell Hotch! Then he reprimanded us and said we weren't being very good friends, but we were just worried about you! We didn't mean to overstep or smother you! We just were trying to figure out how to help, but we shouldn't've tried to get it from the doctor without finding out if you were okay with us knowing first. We- we're sorry." She ended, realizing she was rambling in her haste to explain herself and her teammates.

"Don't worry about it, Garcia," JJ told her with a smile. "Usually when one of us is in here it's because of an unsub, and then it's the whole team's business."

Hotch nodded. "Well," he began, "I can't say we aren't curious or concerned, but we won't press you," he assured, giving a warning look to his team. "It's up to you if and when you tell us, as long as it doesn't interfere with your work once you're back."

JJ groaned at the reminder that she'd have to take time off from work. "How long do I have to wait?" She asked petulantly, looking between Hotch and Emily, wondering which one had the answer.

The two brunettes shared an amused look. They knew JJ hated being out of the field.

"Well, all I know is that you'll have to be cleared by a doctor and a psychiatrist," Hotch told her, not bringing up his curiosity at the involvement of a shrink.

"Dr. Wherren said you'd probably be okay to go back to work in about a week. Until then, you're staying at my place and you will not overdo yourself!" Emily told her seriously before turning to Hotch, "Speaking of, I'll be using some of my vacation time for a couple of days, and then I'll be on desk duty until she gets back to work."

"Understood," Hotch told her with a nod.

"Now," Emily turned back toward JJ, "let's get you home, shall we?"

"Honeybee," Garcia interrupted quickly, wanting to speak to JJ before she left. "I just want you to know that I'm here for you. If you want to talk, you know you can always come to me, right?" She told JJ seriously, receiving a nod in return. "I just want you to know that." She finished, pulling JJ into another gentle hug. "Take care of yourself!" She called after the pair as Emily wheeled JJ outside and toward her car.


	16. Chapter 16

**Warning: Reference to abuse**

* * *

"We're here." Emily cooed as she parked the car in front of her apartment building. JJ had fallen asleep on the drive. Poor girl, Emily thought, she's really been through the ringer.

"Always such a gentleman" JJ teased sleepily as Emily crossed the car and opened the passenger-side door.

"Nuh-uh-uh. Not gonna happen." Emily responded in a warning tone as JJ began to lift herself gingerly from the seat.

"What-?" JJ began but was immediately silenced as Emily's strong arms slid under her knees and behind her back, taking her gracefully from the car. Emily smiled to herself at the feeling of the slim woman in her arms. JJ must've been really tired because she didn't protest Emily's actions anymore. On the contrary, the blonde's arms found themselves wrapping lazily around Emily's neck and her head leaning against Emily's shoulder.

Emily could've died happy at that moment. Here she was, holding the woman she loved more than anything. She walked carefully as to not disturb the woman in her arms. By the time she managed to open the door, JJ was asleep.

Emil slowly walked inside, kicking the door shut behind her. She maneuvered JJ to her bedroom and gently laid the woman on her bed. She pulled off JJ's shoes and jacket, and pulled the blanket over the blonde, tucking her in carefully. Upon turning to go to the guest room, Emily found herself held back by the grip JJ had on her shirt. Every time Emily tried to move, JJ would give a small whimper in her sleep. It was heartbreaking.

Eventually, Emily decided to lay down beside the other woman. She kicked off her own shoes and got into bed next to the blonde. Immediately, JJ's sleeping form curled into Emily's warmth, her face buried in the brunette's chest and her hand still gripping the fabric of Emily's shirt.

With a contented smile, Emily wrapped her arms around her best friend and joined her asleep.


	17. Chapter 17

**Warning: Mentions of violence**

* * *

Emily was unbelievably, incredibly, absolutely content. She was warm and wrapped in some sort of comfort cocoon. She slowly let her eyes flutter open and her vision was filled with blue.

JJ's azure orbs stared back at Emily with a similar look of bliss, but also some embarrassment and fear.

"Hey," Emily said with a sleepy smile, unconsciously running her hand up and down the blonde's back.

"Hey," JJ responded, giving Emily a shy smile. "Did you sleep well?" She asked.

"Wonderfully. You?" Emily informed the blonde.

"Yeah." JJ muttered, "Really, really well." Emily looked into JJ's eyes, swimming in the blue pools. Their lips were so close. Emily felt her breath hitch in anticipation. If she could just lean in a little bit closer…

"So, how do pancakes sound for breakfast?" Emily inquired, shaking herself from her thoughts.

"Sounds great," JJ told her with a smile.

"Perfect," Emily beamed in response, getting out of bed. "After that, we can watch some TV or something." She suggested, receiving a nod from JJ. They were just about to head out to the kitchen when Emily placed a hand lightly on JJ's shoulder. "And, hey," she said softly, "if you want to talk about anything, I'm right here. I'll probably ask you if you do every once in a while, but you never have to say yes. It's just so you know that I'm here and ready to listen. I want to be there for you, Jay. I'll always be there for you." Emily wrapped her arms around JJ in a gentle hug, before leading the way into the kitchen.

"Chocolate chips in your pancakes?" Emily asked as she reached into the cupboard, pulling out the pancake mix.

"Of course," JJ responded, her eyes lighting up at the thought. Emily chuckled at JJ's excitement and got to work over the stove.

She loved playing house with JJ. Waking up next to the blonde, fixing her breakfast, nothing could dull her mood. Emily started to put on a show for JJ. As she cooked each pancake, she'd sprinkle the chocolate chips in with a flourish and flip the pancake in the pan. She grinned as JJ giggled, delighted she could make the blonde so happy. For her grand finale, Emily used the spatula to flip the pancake over her head, spin around, and catch it on the plate, before setting the stack of chocolate chip pancakes in front of JJ.

The blonde clapped, laughing. "That was quite a show, Ms. Prentiss," JJ complimented. "You'll have to teach me how to do that one day."

"Oh no no no," Emily said in a falsely serious voice. "If you learn my secrets, I'll never get to see that look of awe and hear that beautiful laugh."

JJ pouted, slouching in her chair and digging into her pancakes petulantly.

"Then again," Emily pondered, tapping a finger to her chin, pretending to be deep in thought. "I could always make you laugh another way," JJ's eyebrow rose at that, looking up at Emily curiously. "I could always…" the brunette began, "tickle you!" she shouted, lunging at the blonde and tickling her, making JJ shriek with surprise and laughter.

"Okay, okay! You don't have to teach me! Stop!" JJ begged between fits of giggles. Emily stood back, smiling at the gorgeous blonde. "That was mean," JJ complained, trying to pout at Emily, but Emily could see the smile tugging at the corners of the blonde's mouth.

"You love me," Emily teased, turning to grab her own plate of food and sit beside JJ.

"Yeah, I do," JJ admitted with a laugh. "You're lucky I do, though. And don't forget, I carry a gun," JJ warned.

"Oh, don't even pretend to be all scary," Emily taunted, "You could never hurt me."

"True," JJ huffed, defeated, but she soon looked up at Emily, smiling. "Thanks for this," she added in a more serious tone.

"For what?" Emily inquired, curiously.

"Everything," JJ told her. "For letting me stay here. For making me laugh. For sleeping next to me last night," the blonde ducked her head shyly at that one. "For just being you." She finished.

"Those are stupid things to thank me for," Emily brushed off. "I'd do anything for you. In a heartbeat. You don't have to thank me for it." She told the blonde seriously. "You're my best friend. I'm always here for you."

JJ reached out and clasped Emily's hand on the table. "Still. Thank you. I couldn't've asked for a better best friend." They sat there for a moment, content in silence, taking in the sincerity of each other's words.

"Anyway," Emily finally broke the silence, standing up to clear the dishes. "Whatcha wanna watch?"

The pair spent most of the day watching movies and eating takeout. In the evening, the whole team came over for a monopoly tournament.

"You guys better let me win or I'll have you fired," Hotch had warned playfully.

"Do your worst, Hotchner," Emily responded when she had won, giving her boss a teasing death glare. Hotch had raised his hands and hung his head in defeat, conceding to Emily.

It was nearing 9 PM when the team started trickling out.

"Take care of her," Morgan instructed Emily as they said goodbye.

"I will," Emily responded, looking over at JJ who was hugging Garcia.

"When can I expect you back?" Hotch inquired, his mind rarely off work for long.

"I'm thinking the day after tomorrow. JJ's healing quickly, so as long as nothing worsens, she'll be coming back only a week or so after that." Emily informed him. He flashed her one of his rare smiles, happy he would soon have his team back.

"Well, then," he began, making his way out the door, "I'll see you soon."

The door finally closed behind the last of the team, leaving JJ and Emily alone once more.

"That was fun," Emily said turning to JJ and receiving a smile in response. "Now how about you take a hot shower, I can wrap your ribs, and then we watch a movie before heading to bed?"

"That sounds good," JJ nodded, heading toward the bathroom.

"Be careful with your ribs," Emily called after her, watching the blonde walk away and certainly not hating the view if she admitted it to herself. She shook her head and went to pick out a movie, smiling to herself as she thought about her blonde houseguest. Sure, it was under bad circumstances, but she was really enjoying her life right now.


	18. Chapter 18

**Warning: Reference to abuse and violence**

* * *

About half an hour later, JJ stepped out of the bathroom, clad in one of Emily's oversized nightshirts and sweatpants. Emily gulped, trying to tear her eyes from the beautiful image of JJ in her clothes.

"Um…uh…" she spluttered, desperately attempting to collect herself. "If you wanna just sit on the chair here, I'll wrap your ribs." She offered. JJ smiled in response and sat down gingerly, trying to hide her wince.

"Hey, you okay?" Emily asked, noticing the masked pain.

"Yeah," JJ responded, "yeah, I'm fine. Just…hurts."

"Your ribs?" Emily inquired, wondering if something else was bothering the woman.

"Yeah," JJ agreed slowly. Emily didn't miss the uncertainty in her voice, but she decided to let it slide for now.

"Okay," she replied, her skepticism seeping into her voice slightly before she shook it off. "If you could just raise your shirt, I'll wrap you up." She said, holding up a bandage.

JJ slowly lifted her shirt to just below her bra and Emily couldn't help but gasp at the sight the action revealed. She'd seen JJ's injuries before, but every time it was another shock, another flash of guilt.

JJ's torso looked like a Jackson Pollock painting. Bruises of every color dotted her small frame. Emily knelt down, crouching in front of the blonde and unwrapping the bandage in her hands. Slowly, she began to wind the bandage around JJ's trim waist, staring into those beautiful eyes the entire time.

The world slowed to a stop as Emily's fingers brushed over JJ's toned stomach, her mind falling into JJ's eyes. The brunette soon realized she was holding her breath, praying for the moment not to end. She was highly aware of her fingers on JJ's skin, the bandage wrapping around, and around, and around.

Finally, Emily realized there was no more bandage left. She shook herself out of her trance and fastened the bandage, placing her hand gently on JJ's stomach before standing up quickly.

"You're all set," she told JJ softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Thanks," JJ responded in like, slowly lifting herself from the chair. They were nose to nose, now. Emily felt her heart pounding in her chest; she wondered if JJ could hear it. Her mouth was bone dry; her tongue felt like cotton. JJ's lips were so close, just millimeters from her own. Emily felt a stirring in her stomach, pulling her toward her friend. She wanted so desperately to close the gap. She leaned forward, inching her face toward the blonde. A hairbreadth from the other woman's lips, she regained control of herself and placed a kiss on the blonde's nose instead.

"So," Emily began awkwardly, pulling away, "how about that movie?"

"Yeah," JJ agreed softly, seemingly dazed before shaking herself back to the present. "What should we watch?"

They spent the next few hours watching rom-coms and throwing popcorn at each other or trying to catch it in their own mouths. Pretty soon, it was nearing midnight and both of them were fighting off yawns.

Emily desperately wanted the blonde in her bed again, but she didn't want to assume JJ would too. "The guest room is right down the hall." She offered hesitantly.

JJ seemed to freeze momentarily before nodding jerkily. "Right. Okay." She said, with something Emily almost thought was disappointment in her voice.

"Unless," Emily began, almost subconsciously, "unless you wanted to stay in my room again." She suggested. "Not that you have to or anything," she added quickly. "Just, ya know, for the nightmares."

JJ seemed to brighten at the idea. "I'd like that." She told Emily shyly, receiving a large grin from Emily.

"Right this way, then!" Emily guided, trying not to skip to her room. She loved the domestic life with JJ and desperately wanted it to last forever.

They climbed into bed next to one another before turning to face the center of the king-sized mattress.

Emily surveyed JJ, wondering what the blonde was feeling, what she was thinking about, what Will had done to her. She wanted to know everything about the woman next to her.

"What?" JJ asked, noticing Emily's intent expression.

"Nothing." Emily brushed off, shaking away her thoughts.

"No really," JJ pressed, "what is it? I'm sure you have questions. I can't say I'll be able to answer them all, but I'm willing to try." The blonde admitted.

"Are you sure you're ready?" Emily checked.

"I'm sure," JJ replied with certainty.


	19. Chapter 19

**Warning: Descriptions of abuse, sexual harassment, etc**

* * *

"How did this start?" Emily asked, jumping right into the conversation.

"I'm not totally sure," JJ admitted, averting her eyes from Emily's penetrating stare. "He's always been kinda…possessive? He never liked me being around other men; he even talked about beating up Derek when he drove me home after a night out." Emily felt her eyes widen and couldn't decide between horror and hilarity as her reaction. Of course, she hated hearing that Will had been so controlling, but the idea of him trying to go head to head against Morgan was something she wished she could see. JJ noticed her expression, "I know, right? Will against Morgan? Totally an even match." She said sarcastically.

"Anyway," JJ continued, "After a while, he started getting angrier and angrier whenever I was around men. I'd come home, and it was like an interrogation. He'd get all up in my face and start screaming, demanding who I'd been with. The only time he was okay with me being around men was when he showed me off to his friends." JJ blushed and ducked her head in embarrassment at this.

"What do you mean?" Emily asked. It was normal in a relationship to want to talk to your friends about how amazing your partner was, but Emily felt there was something different about the way Will went about it.

JJ hid her face, "he used to…to put his hands on me around them," her muffled whisper floated to Emily's ears. "He liked bragging about my body and the sex and stuff. I dunno. I didn't really like it." Her voice had gotten quieter with every word, hushed in humiliation.

"Oh Jayje," Emily whispered, horrified at how Will had objectified the blonde. "You don't have to like it, honey. That's not okay for anyone to do." JJ lifted her head out of the covers slightly.

"But it's normal for partners to brag about their boyfriend or girlfriend." JJ protested, echoing Emily's earlier thoughts.

"True," Emily admitted, "but not like that. They should want to tell their friends how amazing you are, your beautiful eyes, soft hair, kindness, gentleness. They should want to talk about the way your nose twitches when you smell coffee or how you get cheese dust all over your face when you eat Cheetos. They should tell their friends about how they want to give you the world and spoil you rotten just to see your eyes light up like they do when you smile. They should talk about you like you're the love of their life, not some object they've just added to their collection." Emily finished in a whisper, her voice oozing with sincerity. She meant every word, in fact, she had wanted to talk about all of those things to everyone she met, but JJ didn't know the true depth in her words.

"You're sweet," JJ told Emily, a small blush tinting her cheeks. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment, JJ searching for any sign of deception in Emily while Emily allowed herself to get lost in the beautiful blonde.

"Anyway," JJ broke the silence that had fallen around them, continuing her story. "It just started to get worse and worse. He got more and more possessive and jealous, and eventually, he started accusing me of cheating. I came back really late one night, and I was a little tipsy. He thought I'd slept with someone and started screaming at me. That was the first time he hit me. He apologized immediately; he told me he was just really worried about me and he didn't mean for it to come out as anger. He was really nice for about a week after that; sweet and charming, just like the man I fell in love with.

"But it didn't last. We got another case and I was gone for three days. When I came home, he was drunk on the couch. He told me he'd been fired because he'd yelled at his boss. He said it was because he was so worried about me the stress got to him. I told him I can take care of myself and he shouldn't get mad at me just because he can't keep his emotions in check. He didn't like that. He threw me against the wall and held his forearm to my throat." JJ's eyes were glazed over, and Emily knew she was lost in her memory. She wanted to get the blonde away from the terrible figures in her mind, but she knew JJ needed to get this out.

"He called me horrible names. He told me everything wrong in his life was my fault. He said that he was the man; he should be in charge, making more money and I should be at home tending to him. He told me if I ever loved him I'd start treating him better. He said I hurt him, that I'd broken his heart. He kept telling me he loved me and that it all would be fine if I just treated him better…

"From then on he started telling me what to do to treat him better. I didn't want to hurt him. I wanted to make up for whatever I'd done so I tried to do everything he told me. Sometimes I'd mess up, so he'd hit me or kick me or something…" JJ had tears rolling across her face now, landing on the bed. Finally, her trance broke and those blue eyes looked into Emily's once more. "I deserved it, Em." JJ whispered brokenly. "I wanted to leave, but he was right. I'm the reason he got fired. I'm the reason everything went wrong. I deserved it. If I had been better or if I had gotten it right, he wouldn't've had to hurt me."

Emily was horrified. She'd expected JJ to blame herself, but to hear the blonde say those terrible things made reality hit closer to home than Emily would've liked.

"No." Emily insisted. "It was not your fault. None of this was your fault. He got fired because he didn't like reporting to anyone. He wants power and he tried to exert that over his boss. He failed. All of this is because he wanted more power. He was so insecure, he couldn't feel like a man without you being completely under his thumb. It's not your fault, honey. It's not." Emily wrapped her arms around the blonde's small frame. JJ shook with sobs and guilt, finally releasing the pain from who knows how long of mistreatment. "It's not your fault," Emily repeated over and over. "It's not your fault."


	20. Chapter 20

**Warning: Graphic descriptions of violence, abuse, and sexual assault**

* * *

It took about 20 minutes, but eventually, JJ's sobs died down. She pulled back from Emily's now sodden shirt, glancing up at the brunette with puffy red eyes. "I'm sorry I got your shirt wet," she mumbled, a hint of fear in her voice.

"Don't even worry about it," Emily told her with a reassuring smile. "It's just a shirt. It goes through the washing machine every week and gets soaked through. A little water isn't gonna hurt it." She explained, trying to show JJ that she had nothing to fear. It seemed to work because, after a moment, JJ gave her a small nod and a weak smile.

"Do you want to keep talking about it or do you want to call it a night?" Emily asked gently.

"I…" JJ began, unsure. "I don't know. I mean…it's really hard to talk about, but I'm worried if I stop I won't be able to start again." She told the brunette.

"Well that's okay," Emily told her with another comforting smile. "How about I ask you questions and you can tell me if you want me to ask a different question, maybe phrase it as a simple yes or no question or stop altogether. Does that sound okay?" She prodded gently, receiving another small nod from JJ.

"Okay," Emily began, trying to figure out what to ask. "How long has this been going on?"

JJ glanced away and shrugged noncommittally, not seeing Emily's look of utter confusion. She'd thought she'd found an easy question, but it seemed to have upset JJ even more.

"Alright…can you tell me why you don't like that question? You don't have to answer it, just maybe explain why it upset you so I know?" Emily tried softly.

JJ hesitated for a moment. The room remained silent for so long, Emily almost gave up and tried a new question when JJ whispered, "I know you feel guilty."

Emily blinked, still confused. "What do you mean, JJ?" She asked.

JJ still refused to meet her eyes but muttered, "I know you feel like you should've noticed. But you don't have to. I worked very hard to hide it from you guys." The blonde explained. So, it's been going on for longer than she wants me to know, Emily realized. How long had she missed the signs? She shook her head, trying to clear her guilt and stop the cycle of self-blame between the two friends.

"You don't have to worry about that, Jayje," Emily told her quietly.

"But I'm upsetting you," JJ insisted. "I hate making you feel bad in any way. I should've told you. It's not your fault you didn't notice. No one did. I made sure of it. Hell, I wasn't even sure what was going on." She admitted.

"Okay…" Emily agreed slowly. "Okay, I'll try not to feel so bad. I can't promise, but I'll try. Now can you tell me how long it's been happening?" JJ searched Emily's eyes for signs of continued self-hatred.

"Yesterday was a year since he first hit me," JJ admitted, ducking her head once more, her voice nearly a whisper.

A year. He had been hurting her for a year. How had she missed it? How had they all missed it? Emily felt her eyes heat up, threating to let tears fall.

"I'm here now, JJ," Emily told her. "I will do everything possible to keep you safe for the rest of your life if you let me." JJ's blue eyes returned to her brown ones.

"Thank you, Emily." The blonde whispered. "Now," she said, her voice stronger. "Any more questions?"

"Hmmm…" Emily pondered, searching for others that wouldn't be too hard to answer. "Does anyone else know what he did to you?"

"Um…" JJ tried to remember. "He had a few friends that saw him yell at me. They came over every Tuesday for beer and poker, he lost so much money to them…anyway, one of the guys, Tyler, he would stand up for me. He'd tell Will to back off and make him stop drinking and he'd always give me a smile or something. He was really sweet," JJ smiled at the memories. "But Will never got physical around them. After they left, though, was a different story…he got mad at me because I didn't tell him his friends' hands, so he lost, or he'd smack me for getting too close to them instead of standing by him all night, so he could keep a hand on my ass. One time Tyler grabbed my hand and pulled me away from Will when he was really in my face. That was probably the worst time…I almost passed out from the pain…" JJ whispered before adding in a voice so quiet Emily wasn't even sure she could hear it properly, "I wish I had."


	21. Chapter 21

**Warning: Graphic descriptions of violence, rape, and abuse**

* * *

"You wish you had? What do you mean you wish you had?" Emily asked in confusion.

"After that…that was the one time…he…" JJ tried to explain but she began to shake as her memories overwhelmed her.

"Hey," Emily tried to comfort her. "JJ it's okay. Look at me, honey, can you do that? Just look at me," she cooed before finally seeing recognition in those blue eyes. "That's it, sweetheart. It's okay. You're safe. I'm right here. It's Emily. You're in my room. Stay with me, angel." She encouraged as she watched JJ try to fight her way out of the hell inside her mind.

"He hurt me, Emily," JJ whispered in a voice that broke Emily's heart. It was a voice filled with agony and terror. Emily didn't know just what Will had done, but she knew it was terrible.

"What happened, Jayje?" Emily prodded softly, knowing that JJ needed to get everything out. Emily placed a hand on JJ's shoulder, rubbing up and down in an attempt to soothe the blonde and keep her grounded.

"He dragged me upstairs. I was barely conscious," JJ began, taking shuddering breaths and trying to steady herself. "The next thing I knew he'd…god…he used my own handcuffs…" she whispered brokenly.

"Oh god…" Emily whispered, realizing where this was headed.

"I couldn't move," JJ continued, screwing her eyes shut against the memories. "I was in so much pain and my hands were cuffed around the bedpost…he practically tore my clothes off…broke the button on my favorite pants," she mentioned with a sad chuckle.

"No," Emily whispered in horror.

"He…god…he kept touching me…I wasn't wet…he didn't use lube…it hurt so bad…" JJ whimpered. "I mean…I hadn't wanted to…hadn't let him…not for a few weeks…so I know he needed…but…couldn't he…it hurt so bad…he left me bleeding…slept in the guest room…didn't uncuff me until the next morning…I couldn't walk right for a week…" JJ finished, her voice full of anguish. Emily didn't know what to say. She'd heard the doctor mention that JJ had some scarring, but she'd hoped Will had just been bad at foreplay…but this? He'd raped JJ. Her JJ. How could anyone do such a thing?

"I'm right here," she whispered, pulling the blonde toward her and rubbing JJ's back. That bastard had raped JJ. She'd kill him. "I'm not going anywhere." Her JJ. "You're safe now." How dare he? "You're safe." She'd kill him. "I've got you."

Emily felt sick. Her stomach churned with fury and disgust at that so-called man. She spent her life locking up the bad guys, but she'd never seen the horror this close. The damage it caused JJ. The agony he put her through. Every cell in her body was full of fury. She wanted to go to his holding cell and throttle him right this instant. She wanted to watch him fear her like he'd made JJ fear him. At the same time, she wanted to wrap JJ up and never let go. She would die before she let that bastard near JJ again. She wanted to show him that JJ deserved so much better. She wanted to give JJ everything she deserved. God…she'd give anything to keep JJ safe…to make her happy.

"I'm right here," she whispered, clutching the woman in her arms, desperately trying to convince herself that JJ was safe. She felt the smaller woman shaking in her arms, crying at the pain she'd felt, what she'd lost. Emily held her, rubbing her back and whispering to her, pressing kisses to the top of her head. Long after JJ had cried herself to sleep, Emily held her. Throughout the night, Emily held her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have anything negative to say about the way JJ is handling this situation, don't. You have no idea how much abuse can affect a person. I recently got a comment insulting JJ and I find it despicable. If you read stories about this sort of content, you have to try to understand the point of view of someone going through this sort of abuse. If you can't do that, keep your mouth shut. Other people have actually experienced things like this and your comments are unwarranted, ignorant, and merely expose your own pathetic need to make yourself out to be strong. If you can't understand the strength of people who have survived this sort of thing, please don't read my stories.


	22. Chapter 22

**Warning: Mentions of Abuse**

**This chapter explores the effect JJ's trauma has on Emily. It provides a glimpse at the pain faced by those indirectly harmed by abuse.**

* * *

It was well past noon when Emily awoke, JJ still clutched in her arms. She brushed the blonde hair from JJ's face, trying to preserve the serenity of the moment. After a few minutes, she stood up, careful to keep JJ comfortable. She went downstairs and started making breakfast, cooking some bacon and scrambled eggs. She also filled a large pitcher with iced tea and grabbed two glasses, knowing JJ would be dehydrated.

Finally, Emily loaded everything onto a tray and brought it upstairs, placing the food on the bedside table.

JJ was still curled up in bed, looking absolutely adorable, in Emily's opinion. Before she could think, Emily slowly leaned down and kissed JJ's cheek. "Wake up, beautiful." She cooed, wanting to get JJ rehydrated before the impending headache got too bad.

"Mmm?" JJ muttered groggily, blinking her eyes open.

"It's time to wake up, sweetheart," Emily whispered. "I made breakfast." She tempted the blonde.

JJ's nose twitched, noticing the scent. "Bacon?" She mumbled sleepily.

"Mhmm," Emily confirmed, chuckling.

"Fiiiine," JJ conceded, sitting up reluctantly. Emily's chuckle grew into a laugh and she placed the tray on JJ's lap before climbing back into bed next to her.

"Mmmm," JJ practically moaned as she munched on the bacon, closing her eyes in satisfaction.

"I take it you like it?" Emily asked amusedly as she helped herself to some eggs.

"God, Emily," JJ's response was muffled by the food in her cheek, "it's fantastic. I can't remember the last time I had such good food."

"Hey!" Emily pretended to be offended, "I cooked for you yesterday!"

"I mean before I came here," JJ placated with a chuckle.

"You better," Emily warned, but her smile betrayed her serious tone. "Anyway, I promised Hotch I'd be in tomorrow, so what do you wanna do today? Or…well, this afternoon?"

JJ looked at her in confusion before turning to the clock. "It's already 1:30 PM?" she cried in alarm.

"Relax," Emily told her. "You needed the sleep, and the arraignment isn't until 6."

"Oh right," JJ sighed, hating the reminder of her abuser. "I guess," JJ huffed, laying back against the pillows and grumpily eating more bacon. Emily had to admit that the blonde looked extremely adorable when she was acting so petulant.

"Now come on," Emily pressed, "what should we do today?"

"I dunno," JJ sighed, finishing the last of her eggs and gulping down the tea. Emily noticed the blonde was avoiding her gaze.

"You okay, Jay?" She asked gently, lowering herself onto the bed beside JJ.

"I don't know how I'm gonna deal with tonight," JJ admitted softly, "I don't know if I can stand to see him."

"Well, it probably won't even come to that. The judge will probably grant Alice's request for no bail without a second thought." Alice was the lawyer Emily had arranged to prosecute Will. She and Emily went way back, always shoved together by both of their parents being constantly out of town. Alice was the best, so when it came to JJ, Emily had immediately known that was whom she had to call.

"But what if –," JJ began to protest.

"If he tries to argue she'll present me as a witness first. He attacked a federal agent, Jay. There's no way the judge will go easy on him." Emily assured her, gently taking the blonde's hand in her own. The long fingers of her free hand moved to caress JJ's chin, carefully adjusting so she was looking into those blue eyes. "It's gonna be okay. I'm right here no matter what," Emily assured her in a whisper.

Emily felt herself melt inside at the vulnerability in her friend's eyes. This was a woman she would give her all to protect. Slowly, she leaned forward and pressed her lips to JJ's forehead.

When she pulled back, JJ's eyes were closed, and a look of pure serenity was on her face.

"I love you," Emily breathed, staring deeply into JJ's face.

"I love you too," JJ whispered back, her eyes fluttering open. They sat like that for several minutes, facing one another and staring into each other's eyes.

"Anyway," Emily broke herself out of the reverie, "your breakfast is getting cold. I'm gonna take a shower while you finish up, okay?" She smiled when she received a nod from JJ and made her way to the bathroom.

Once behind the safety of the closed door, Emily sank to the floor. She felt so much anguish that she knew she had no right to feel. It caused her so much agony to see the pain the woman she loved had been put through. Lost in thought, she turned on the shower and began her routine.

How could she have missed this? It was past the time for that question, though. Now she had to figure out how to make it right. How could she repair the damage that monster had inflicted? She had no idea. She would listen to every horrible, agonizing memory JJ needed to get out no matter how much pain it caused her, but it wasn't enough. She couldn't do enough. She couldn't help fast enough. She couldn't stand the idea of JJ remaining in pain for any longer. It tore her apart. She wanted nothing more than to take all of JJ's pain and feel it herself instead. She felt helpless. Powerless. Useless. The woman she loved was in agony and she could do nothing. JJ deserved someone better. She deserved someone who could actually help her and show her what a relationship should be. Sure, Emily had incredible self-control and would work as hard as necessary to be the right person for JJ, but was it enough? Could she be the person JJ needed? Could she become that person fast enough? There were so many questions, so much pain filling her., and so much guilt that she was in pain. JJ was the one that had gone through this, she had no right to feel like this. JJ needed her.

Emily turned the shower to cold and felt the frigid water hit her face. She needed to snap out of it. She could barely make sense of all the thoughts flying through her head. All she needed to think about was one thing: JJ. And that's what she was going to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have anything negative to say about the way JJ is handling this situation, don't. You have no idea how much abuse can affect a person. I recently got a comment insulting JJ and I find it despicable. If you read stories about this sort of content, you have to try to understand the point of view of someone going through this sort of abuse. If you can't do that, keep your mouth shut. Other people have actually experienced things like this and your comments are unwarranted, ignorant, and merely expose your own pathetic need to make yourself out to be strong. If you can't understand the strength of people who have survived this sort of thing, please don't read my stories.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A different version of this chapter (without so much of the team) was posted on FanFiction.net with the same title

**TW: Mentions of Abuse and Sexual assault**

* * *

 

JJ and Emily agreed to call the team over around 4 PM. Soon, the group was gathered in Emily’s living room, all with curious looks on their faces.

“What’s going on?” Morgan inquired, “you okay, JJ?”

JJ nodded stiffly, taking a deep breath, and opening her mouth in an attempt to talk. It quickly became clear that no words were going to come out.

“Will has been arrested.” Emily cut in.

“What? Sugarplum, what happened?” Penelope cooed to JJ.

“White men account for over 65% of those arrested for violent crimes,” Reid chimed in.

“What was he arrested for?” Morgan demanded, his eyes narrowing.

Finally, JJ spoke up. “Spousal abuse,” she whispered, her voice small and her body seeming to try to follow suit.

“What?” Morgan growled, standing up quickly, fists clenching and unclenching.

Garcia rushed to JJ’s side with a cry of “Buttercup!” quickly wrapping the smaller woman in a strong embrace.

Reid stood frozen, no amount of statistics allowing him to process the information that his friend was one of the victims they fought so hard for every day.

Hotch and Rossi stood straighter, meeting Emily’s gaze. They both forced down their emotions in favor of professionalism, determined to control the situation as much as possible.

“Where is that son of a bitch?” Morgan snarled, cracking his neck and wringing his hands in fury. Emily watched as Morgan noticed JJ flinch at his voice, cowering into herself and Garcia even further. She gave the dark agent a warning look, but it was unnecessary. Morgan was forcibly relaxing himself, regarding JJ with eyes full of concern. He approached her slowly, kneeling in front of her. “Hey, Jay,” he muttered, his voice gently and caring now. “It’s gonna be okay,” he assured her. “We’re gonna get him.” He slowly took Garcia’s place, wrapping JJ in his strong arms, as though trying to shield her from the pain in the world. Emily smiled softly at the sight before speaking to the group once more.

“The arraignment is in an hour. We should be heading out soon.” She explained, directing the latter sentence at JJ.

“I’m coming.” Morgan stated without room for argument.

Emily opened her mouth to protest, knowing JJ was already anxious enough without feeling self-conscious as the team heard details of the case. Eventually, she closed her mouth once more and nodded, noticing how JJ had closed her eyes and leaned into the man who had always seemed like a brother to her.

“How about the rest of us go back into the BAU to make sure the bad guys don’t bother JJ for a while, so she can focus on destroying Mr. LaMontagne.” Rossi suggested, much to Emily and JJ’s relief. Garcia glanced back at JJ before nodding begrudgingly.

“Tell us how the arraignment goes.” The tech analyst demanded of Emily, who nodded in return, giving the bubbly woman a hug. Soon, it was just Emily, Morgan and JJ remaining, just waiting for 6PM.

6 PM rolled around far too quickly for Emily’s liking. She could see the nerves building inside JJ with every passing minute. Soon enough, they were standing outside the courtroom, Emily suggesting that JJ stay outside unless she was needed.

“No,” JJ was insisting, “I can’t let him win. If I don’t go in there, he’ll know I’m scared of him. He’ll know he has power over me. I can’t let that happen.”

“Okay,” Emily said hesitantly, “but if it gets too much you come out here, okay?” JJ nodded in agreement before squaring her shoulders and taking a deep breath. Almost unconsciously, it seemed, she reached for Emily’s hand, clasping it in her own for support. Emily looked down at their intertwined fingers before glancing up at the blonde who was staring steadfastly at the door in front of them. She took one more centering breath before striding forward and pushing open the doors.

“Ms. Jareau,” Alice greeted as they walked toward the prosecutor’s bench.

“Please,” JJ responded, “call me JJ.”

“Alright JJ,” the lawyer adjusted with a reassuring smile. “They’re just about to bring him in. I shouldn’t need you to speak on your behalf, but if I do you just need to tell the judge what he did. You don’t have to go into details or explain everything. Just tell him he was abusive and answer any questions he has.” Alice explained to her. “I think it’ll be Judge Watson presiding. He’s a little more likely than most to ask for you to speak since he likes to hear all sides of the story, but he’s also extremely fair so he’s almost certain to keep Mr. LaMontagne locked up.” Alice reassured the blonde.

“Emily, you know what to do if I ask you to speak?” Alice checked with her friend.

“Tell the judge what I saw and give the defense attorney hell.” Emily recited, only half joking.

“That’s one way to put it,” Alice chuckled. Just then the door opened, and several guards walked in, escorting Will between them. “Here goes,” Alice muttered, placing a calming hand on JJ’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. He can’t get to you.”

Emily squeezed JJ’s hand, noticing the panic flashing across the blonde’s face. “Hey, it’s gonna be okay,” she whispered. “Remember, if it gets too much you just tell me, and you can leave.” JJ nodded almost imperceptibly, eyes locked on the front of the room.

“All rise for the honorable Judge Watson.” A voice rang through the room, followed by the sound of 30 or so people standing in unison. A middle-aged man with gray hair and laugh lines around his eyes walked through a door in the wall and stepped up to take his seat. “You may be seated.” Was called and the sound of a room full of people sitting down echoed through the court.

Judge Watson fumbled in his robe for a few moments, pulling out a pair of rectangular glasses and placing them on the bridge of his nose. He studied a file in front of him before glancing over the rim of his glasses at the courtroom, surveying those present. Emily noticed his eyes linger on her and JJ’s clasped hands and then on JJ’s stony face poorly disguising her terror. She was pleased to see his eyes soften upon noticing the blonde’s distress before he looked over at the defense.

“In the case of People v. William LaMontagne Jr.” Watson began, “where do you stand?” He asked Alice.

“The People request remand, your honor,” Alice told him in a professional manner. “The defendant has assaulted a federal agent on an ongoing basis, made threats against the lives of multiple federal agents, and shown a disregard for any warnings or threats he is given. He controls all financial assets of himself and his former partner and, as such, we believe him to be a strong flight risk, not to mention the danger he poses to his former partner.” Alice expanded. The judge nodded thoughtfully.

“And the defense?” He asked, turning to look at Will’s lawyer.

“Mr. LaMontagne has been a member of the police force for many years and an upstanding citizen. He is willing to agree to a restraining order keeping him away from his partner and has agreed to surrender his passport.” The defense attorney stated.

“The defendant has recently been fired from his job in the police force,” Alice countered, “and has a history of alcohol abuse. This will diminish the effectiveness of the restraining order as the drinking will lower his inhibitions. He also has ties to Louisiana and we have no assurance that he will not return to his family there.”

“Mr. LaMo-,” The defense lawyer began but the judge interrupted.

“I’d like to hear from the defendant’s former partner, please.” He stated in a firm, though not unkind, voice. Emily felt JJ freeze beside her.

“Your honor, Ms. Jareau has been antagonized by the defendant long enough-,” Alice attempted.

“I understand that,” Watson interrupted, “I don’t mean to cause any distress to Ms. Jareau. However, I need to understand the validity of the claim that the defendant may cause her harm.” He directed his word at JJ, a soft, apologetic smile on his face. Emily could feel JJ’s hand shaking in hers as she saw Morgan lean over the divider and squeeze JJ’s shoulder. The blonde’s palm was damp on Emily’s skin even as JJ stepped forward to address the judge.

“Your honor,” JJ began with more strength than Emily knew was in her, “Will- Mr. LaMontagne has threatened my life multiple times if word of his actions ever got out. He has physically, emotionally, and…and sexually…a- abused me,” JJ explained, her voice faltering and the shaking intensifying. Emily knew it was extremely difficult to admit that what Will had done was abuse and was extremely grateful for the kind look the judge had trained on the blonde. “I fear for my safety, my life, and that of my friends if he were to be allowed to roam free.” She finished, staring at her hands.

The judge nodded with a reassuring smile before sitting back in his chair. “The People’s request for remand is granted. Mr. LaMontagne will return to his cell to await trial. This court is dismissed.” He said, pounding his gavel and moving to stand.

“You bitch!” Will shouted as the crowd stood up, “How could you do this to me? You were supposed to love me!” He screamed, desperately trying to manipulate JJ one last time. Emily was having none of it. She took JJ’s hand firmly in her own and placed an arm around the blonde’s shoulders, guiding her quickly out of the courtroom. “I’ll kill you!” Will screamed. Emily looked over as the doors closed in time to see Morgan shoving Will against the wall by his collar and spitting some clearly choice words in his face before throwing him to the guards to take him away. Only once they were back in the car did Emily release a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. They were quiet the rest of the drive, their hands clasped over the central divider, JJ staring out the window forlornly. This was gonna be a long road to recovery for the blonde, but Emily knew she’d be there every step of the way.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have anything negative to say about the way JJ is handling this situation, don't. You have no idea how much abuse can affect a person. I recently got a comment insulting JJ and I find it despicable. If you read stories about this sort of content, you have to try to understand the point of view of someone going through this sort of abuse. If you can't do that, keep your mouth shut. Other people have actually experienced things like this and your comments are unwarranted, ignorant, and merely expose your own pathetic need to make yourself out to be strong. If you can't understand the strength of people who have survived this sort of thing, please don't read my stories.


	24. Chapter 24

**Warning: Reference to Abuse**

* * *

When they got home, JJ seemed lost in thought.

"What's on your mind, Jen?" Emily pried gently.

"Nothing!' JJ responded quickly, whipping her head around to face Emily.

"Okay," Emily said slowly, "do you wanna talk about anything?" She tried again.

"No, no. I'm fine." The blonde insisted, remaining entirely unconvincing.

"You don't seem fine," Emily told her gently.

JJ sighed, running a hand through her hair anxiously. "I just…seeing Will…I realized…I want to move on with my life. I need to. And I promise this isn't just some rebound thing or confused attachment or something because I've wanted this since before Will but then you said to go for it and I figured you wouldn't but now you've been so nice and I thought maybe you actually do but the point is," JJ finally stopped her rambling, "would you like to go out with me? Like…on a date?" She asked shyly. Emily couldn't stop the grin from spreading across her face.

"I would love to," she told JJ, and her smile was immediately mirrored on the blonde's face.

"Really?" JJ asked.

"Yes, really." Emily laughed lightly as JJ's arms were flung around her before becoming serious once more. "But, are you sure you're ready for this?"

"I've never been more sure of anything," JJ whispered, her forehead pressed against the brunette's.

Emily pulled back slightly, looking into JJ's eyes. Slowly, they leaned forward as one, their lips inching closer until they met in a kiss.

It was like nothing Emily had ever experienced. It was soft and loving. There was passion, sure, but it wasn't rough. It was gentle and sweet, conveying every bit of love and care that had built up in Emily's heart since she had first set eyes on the blonde.

Emily couldn't believe this. She was holding JJ. She was  _kissing_  JJ. She could barely contain her ecstasy.

All too soon, it was over. They pulled back, both gasping for breath. Their foreheads remained pressed together as blue eyes locked with brown.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that," Emily whispered breathlessly.

"Me too," JJ agreed, before ducking her head shyly and tucking it under Emily's chin.

Emily, in turn, wrapped her arms more securely around JJ, one hand coming up to cradle the blonde hair, the other rubbing up and down JJ's back.

"I never thought I'd be able to do that," a muffled voice admitted from Emily's shoulder. "I thought I was stuck with Will for the rest of my life. God, he kept talking about proposing. I was so worried I'd end up marrying him without even telling you how I feel about you. And now you're here and we're going on a date…I can't believe my luck…"

Emily stayed silent, unsure how to respond to the vulnerability in the blonde's voice. She pressed a soft kiss to JJ's temple, swaying slightly and rocking the smaller woman where they stood.

"Well now you have me," she finally stated, "and hopefully you'll end up stuck with me instead," she added with a small chuckle.

JJ let out a small laugh. "I hope so, too," she admitted, pulling back to look into Emily's eyes with more sincerity than the brunette had ever experienced.

And then they were kissing again, and everything was perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have anything negative to say about the way JJ is handling this situation, don't. You have no idea how much abuse can affect a person. I recently got a comment insulting JJ and I find it despicable. If you read stories about this sort of content, you have to try to understand the point of view of someone going through this sort of abuse. If you can't do that, keep your mouth shut. Other people have actually experienced things like this and your comments are unwarranted, ignorant, and merely expose your own pathetic need to make yourself out to be strong. If you can't understand the strength of people who have survived this sort of thing, please don't read my stories.


	25. Chapter 25

**Warning: Reference to Abuse**

* * *

The weeks passed with Emily in a bubble of pure bliss. All the problems of the world seemed to disappear as she focused on her relationship with JJ. She couldn't believe how well it was going. Of course, they were taking it slow, but it was incredible how easily they flowed into their new roles as partners.

They had been going on date after date at the most luxurious restaurants Emily could find. After so long pining over JJ, Emily had decided in no uncertain terms that she was going to spoil her new girlfriend as much as possible.

They were so caught up in their own happiness, it came as a surprise to both of them upon realizing it was the week Will's trial was scheduled to start. The reminder came in a rather unpleasant form of Alice calling them in to practice their testimony. Suddenly, the recent joy they'd experienced seemed to be sucked out.

JJ started trudging dejectedly around their place, as Emily had decided to refer to it since it was clear JJ wasn't going to move back into her old home. Emily did her best to keep JJ's mind off of it, planning a vacation for after the trial was over, but nothing seemed to help. The blonde was practically oozing fear and trepidation as the court date neared. All Emily could do was hold her and wait for it all to be over.

Finally, the day came. The team met them at the courthouse, having been filled in on the situation shortly after the original arraignment. There had been some backlash upon Strauss finding out about Emily and JJ's newfound relationship, but Rossi had quickly taken care of it by pointing out her hypocrisy.

Upon their arrival, Garcia wrapped JJ in a huge hug that the smaller woman was too anxious to return. JJ had kept a death grip on Emily's hand since they got out of the car and had grown more withdrawn with every step toward the courthouse.

The team quickly realized that there wasn't much they could do for their friend. Garcia took JJ's free hand and they filed into the room.

"How you feeling?" Alice asked Emily, realizing JJ's answer was already displayed plainly on her terrified features.

"Good," Emily responded with confidence. "Just excited to get this over with."

"Agreed," Alice sighed, glancing at JJ.

"All rise for the honorable Judge Jacobs."

"Don't worry," Alice whispered, "he's just as fair as Judge Watson. Maybe a little rougher around the edges but that's probably for the best. He won't be lenient on Will." Emily wasn't sure if it was JJ or herself that Alice was trying to comfort but she was glad for it all the same.

"You may be seated. Guards, bring in the defendant."

Will was led in and Emily could feel her girlfriend tense beside her. She rubbed soothing circles on the blonde's hand, attempting to soothe her. She didn't miss the disdainfully smug look Will threw at the both of them and felt sick to her stomach with hatred for the man.

"You may begin your opening statements," the judge directed. And so, it began.


	26. Chapter 26

**Warning: Descriptions of Violence**

* * *

The trial lasted 3 weeks. 3 long, arduous weeks full of long days at court only for Emily to come home to hold JJ as the small woman battled through the panic attacks she had held in all day.

The jury was out for deliberation for all of 30 minutes before, "has the jury reached a decision?"

"We have your honor."

"And what is your verdict?"

"We find the defendant, William LaMontagne Jr. guilty of all charges."

Emily vaguely heard the judge dismissing the jurors, but she was far more focused on JJ. The blonde had tears pouring down her face and her knees were collapsing in relief. Emily just barely managed to hear the date of sentencing as she supported JJ's weight in her arms. The team was about to jump the wall between them in excitement, so Emily began to lead JJ out of the courtroom.

They'd almost passed the wall dividing the audience from the proceedings when they heard a commotion. Emily spun around in time to see Will elbow the guard handcuffing him in the nose, clearly breaking it from the blood that then spurted from it. Another guard ran to grab Will but JJ's ex was practically frothing at the mouth in adrenaline and outright rage. He hit the guard in the stomach, elbowing the man's kidneys as he fell. Will stooped for just a moment to grab the gun from the fallen guard. Even as more men in blue ran toward him, Will leveled the weapon at JJ.

Emily saw the events unfolding in slow motion. She saw Will's gleam of fury in his eyes. She watched the guards running toward him, inches from him. Saw his hand squeeze the trigger just as another guard pulled his own weapon, saw the bullet glint in the lights of the courtroom headed for JJ. She saw her own hands lift from her sides, shoving the blonde to the floor. She heard her own voice screaming for everyone to get down as she, herself, dropped to the floor. She heard another gunshot and saw Will collapse before a pile of officers tackled him, making sure he was dead and kicking the pistol away from him.

When she heard the scream, time sped up again. JJ looked around wildly, terrified at the events that had just occurred. Emily glanced around as well, her eyes settling on a group of people behind them. It was the team. She could see Penelope, Hotch, Reid, Rossi…Morgan! Where was Morgan? Emily helped JJ to her feet quickly before hurrying over to the group.

Morgan was on the ground in the center of their friends, clutching his shoulder.

"I'm fine, guys. Just a graze." He assured them with a grimace just as the EMTs walked in.

"We'll need everyone to step back, please," one of the EMTs stated. Once the team was sure Morgan was in good hands, they crowded around JJ instead. Each of them gave her a hug and their own words of encouragement before stepping back to give her space. As they finished, the EMT spoke again.

"Alright, Agent Morgan. The bullet didn't hit anything important. You don't even need stitches. If you'd like, we could take you to the hospi-," she suggested, but Morgan interrupted with a resounding "No." None of the team liked hospitals. "Okay then," the woman continued, unphased, "for the next three days I'll need you to irrigate the wound with an alcohol solution and wrap it in gauze. You may be sore for a while, but, without complications, you'll be good as new in about 2 weeks."

"Thanks, doc," Morgan told her, pulling his sleeve over his freshly bandaged tricep. She nodded and gave him a smile before she joined the rest of her team beside Will. The group shuffled out of the courtroom to some more space and privacy in the hall.

"Is he-," Penelope began in a small voice, unable to finish her question about Will.

"I'm afraid so," Alice interjected, walking up to the group. JJ's grip tightened on Emily's hand at that, but Emily wasn't sure if it was relief or sadness flashing through her eyes.

"Well, I guess that means we don't have to show up to sentencing," Emily deadpanned. Whether it was the tension of the situation, the whirlwind of emotions of the past month, or purely Emily's comedic genius, Morgan couldn't stop a snicker, and then the whole team burst into laughter. It was a solid five minutes before anyone could get themselves under control again.

"Anyone up for pasta at my place?" Rossi asked once the last giggles had died away.

It was just what they needed. A night of joking, laughing, and friendship. Reid impressed them all with his magic, particularly the trick where he didn't spout a single fact the entire night. Penelope spent all night by JJ's side, providing her comfort in the very touchy-feely way that was Garcia's personal technique. Emily held JJ's hand whenever possible. Rossi made his famously delicious food. Hotch even told them they were all told to take an extended vacation after what they'd been through. Morgan joked and messed with JJ. All in all, Emily couldn't be more grateful to her friends.

The party finally started winding down. Morgan declared his arm hurt too much to play another round of darts. "I know it's not my throwing arm, but you get your whole body into the toss," he'd explained. "No, it's not because she beat me the last 4 games."

It was around 11 PM when JJ and Emily said their goodbyes with promises to meet up again soon. Emily couldn't stop glancing at JJ's face as she drove them home. It seemed more peaceful than it had in years.

"Does it make me a bad person?" JJ asked, breaking the silence in the car. "That I'm relieved he's dead?"

"No, of course not," Emily assured her, having expected these feelings from her girlfriend. "He put you through trauma after trauma. It's natural to want to be free of that."

JJ nodded and Emily reached over the console to grasp the blonde's hand.

"We'll be okay," she promised. "You will be okay."

JJ glanced over at Emily and the brunette could see the pain in her eyes, pain that would stay there for a long time to come. But she also saw the acceptance. JJ believed Emily and knew she was right. They would be okay. They had a long journey ahead of them, but they were both in it for the long haul. They would be okay.


	27. Chapter 27

**Warning: Explicit Content**

* * *

"I'm ready."

"Really? Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Promise?"

"Yes."

This was it. JJ was ready. It had been 2 months since the trial and, despite having slept in the same bed every night, the pair had yet to have sex. Emily was willing to wait as long as necessary for JJ. She'd wait forever if that's what her girlfriend wanted. She knew it was going to be hard and scary for the blonde, but JJ'd said she was ready and Emily wasn't about to refuse her.

Now, here they were, sitting on the couch, finishing a bottle of wine. Emily put her glass down on the coffee table and leaned forward, capturing JJ's lips against her own. She took the blonde's glass and placed it beside her own as she moved closer to her girlfriend.

Hands tangled in hair as bodies meshed together. Fingers exploring every inch of each other's faces, arms, torsos. Finally, Emily pulled back, taking JJ's hands and guiding her toward the bedroom.

"I'm gonna leave the door ajar so you know you can leave at any moment," Emily whispered, doing just that before gently pushing JJ against the wall. She returned to kissing the blonde, hands sliding over her waist. Every once in awhile she'd pull back checking, "is this okay?" and waiting for a nod before leaning back in.

Emily guided JJ to the bed, laying her down gently as she checked in with her girlfriend once again.

"Can I take your shirt off?" She asked the blonde. At JJ's nod, she slowly slipped the blouse over JJ's head, placing it on the pillow beside them. "It's right there in case you wanna put it back on," she explained. "Is it okay for me to remove my shirt?" She asked. JJ shook her head and Emily immediately nodded, "that's okay we can stay like this." But JJ shook her head again.

"You can't remove it because I want to." She teased with a wink, pulling Emily's shirt off. Emily chuckled and took the shirt from JJ, throwing it into some forgotten corner.

That's how the rest of their clothes went, too, Emily asking about each article and placing each piece of clothing neatly beside the pair, JJ pulling Emily's clothes off before Emily would toss them across the room.

Once both were fully bare, Emily returned to kissing JJ's lips. Her hands, meanwhile, were sliding over the smooth skin beneath them. Her fingers reached the edge of JJ's breasts as she pulled back, looking into JJ's eyes for permission. When she saw it, her hands gently brushed over the peaks, fingers teasing JJ's nipples, relishing in the closed-eyed bliss on JJ's face. Soon, Emily's mouth joined in the fun and JJ even let slip a few moans.

Emily pinched one of JJ's nipples gently and the blonde's eyes flew open. Immediately, Emily stopped, getting off of JJ and hovering by the blonde's head.

"Are you okay? Are you with me?" She asked concerned. It took a moment, but then JJ nodded.

"Sorry." The blonde said, abashed.

"That's okay," Emily told her with a smile. "No pinching. Got it. Do you want to continue or should we stop?" She asked, conveying the care she felt for the woman before her in her eyes.

"Continue," JJ told her. And so they did. Emily returned to simply kissing JJ for a while before reattempting going further. This time it went much better. By the time she asked JJ for permission to go lower (which JJ granted breathlessly), the blonde was already soaked.

Emily smiled upon noticing her girlfriend's arousal, flicking a finger softly over the blonde's clit. She was rewarded with a sharp buck from the woman under her.

"God, Emily," JJ moaned as Emily probed her clit once more, teasing the blonde with the lightness and infrequency of her touches. "C'mon," JJ finally begged, her hips thrashing to make contact, "more. Please."

Emily could never say no to her. She dipped two fingers into the wetness below JJ's clit, making sure they were thoroughly lubricated in JJ's own fluids. She then moved her fingers back to the spot that seemed to make the blonde so aroused and began to move them in slow circles.

As a moan bubbled up from deep inside the smaller woman, Emily leaned forward to kiss her, speeding up her fingers as they circled her clit. Even as her arm began to cramp, Emily didn't stop, JJ's face of pleasure was plenty of motivation to keep her going. Finally, Emily's efforts were rewarded as JJ's hips lifted clear off the bed, hands gripping brunette hair, mouth drown open in a silent scream before relaxing to release a small groan of pleasure.

"God, Emily," JJ panted, "that was incredible."

"I'm glad, angel," Emily kissed her girlfriend.

"You were so sweet and caring and you kept checking with me. I loved it," the blonde admitted.

"Well that's how it should be," Emily assured her, "and, if you're okay with it, that's how it will be for as long as I live. I will care for you and protect you and love you forever." She vowed. JJ was most definitely okay with it, and, eventually, even returned Emily's promise of eternal love on an altar in front of their team. It would take time, they knew, it wasn't an easy road to recovery, but they had each other and they knew that one day, they'd get there. Together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm working on a Supergirl Kara/Lena story now so this may be it for Jemily from me (I fell in love with the SuperCorp pairing). Hope you guys enjoyed!


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